Cheeyev
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This person has Assburgers Syndrome, so you can't say anything bad! :-( Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck. |
—Cheeyev himself, showing that of all the things you can call him, 'not self-aware' isn't one of them. | ||
Cheeyev is the DeviantArt handle of freshly-minted lol-cow Eli Symanowicz, a 25-year-old masochist from the United States, who became notorious in late 2013 for being the most lulzy attention whore on the site since Chasethehedgehog. When he's not posting five journals a day whining about how much his life sucks, this emo fag is busy stealing others' art. Oh, and he claims to have Asperger's Syndrome; surprise, surprise.
Journals
Cheeyev bombards his unsuspecting watchers with whiny rants which are usually previous journals that have been slightly reworded. Between January 1 and January 23, 2014, he has posted fifty journals, many titled "Vent" or "Semi-Vent." These journals are filled to the brim with self-loathing and crybaby antics, but are mostly an attempt on his part to seek compliments.
Journals include his friend getting hacked, calling out other members for laughing at his art, self-harming habits, sucking at Transformice and getting blocked by everyone. In addition, every couple of days (sometimes multiple times a day) Cheeyev will repost his "Lonely" journal with the same message every time: Yeah, exactly what the title says.. Sorry.. If you want to talk to me, my skype is "peels9765"... Sorry.. ^^;
As of the end of January 2014, Cheeyev has 682 deviations on DeviantArt. Since the counter goes up when journals are posted, and Cheeyev has posted an astounding 439 of them, that means over 64% of all his deviations are journals. Is this guy using DeviantArt to showcase "his" art, or just as a free, online psychiatrist's couch?
It should also be noted that Cheeyev suffers from exceedingly severe self-inflicted Paranoia, and merely telling him that he did or said something in the wrong way is enough to send him into a panic.
Art
Whether it consists of stolen pixel traces or crappy drawings, his artwork never improves. Despite compliments from his fans, his responses are similar to his journals. Some commonly used words or phrases in the description of the drawings are: Godawful, butthurt, *sob*, and haters. His terrible attention seeking methods baffle even the smartest of people. Maybe others are hesitant to call bullshit because of the disorders he claims to have. He is sooooooooo GAYEE that other gays are scared of him.
—DeviantartConfessions member, on Cheeyev's bullcrap. |
Other 'confessions' include Cheeyev's manipulation of his watchers, how he should be a character in Animal Crossing, teenage angst and how the D.A. admins defend his harassment of others.
Cheeyev can be quite the douche
One of the better, most-recent examples of how Cheeyev stirs up trouble is over a birthday gift between friends. DeviantArt member Silverx-2013 drew a modest gift for his friend Natasha-Delphox's birthday, causing Cheeyev to accuse his then-good acquaintance Silverx-2013 of being a traitor for daring to draw something for someone who "hates" him. Thus, one more person becomes painfully aware of Cheeyev's true nature; minus one ally for Cheeyev.
— Natasha-Delphox, revealing how Cheeyev wins friends and influences people. |
The meltdown was so drastic, it caused someone who was at the time pretending to be one of the more omnipresent of Cheeyev's white knights, a DeviantArt member who goes by the user name SatsuAyaka, to quickly admonish the irritating little brat. Cheeyev's obstinate personality has proved too tough for SatsuAyaka's best attempts to quell the drama though, as despite going out of her way to chat with him on Skype in an attempt to get him to change his ways, he continues to perpetrate all the bad habits that have made him notorious throughout DeviantArt. How long until the scorpion known as Cheeyev stings this frog? If the fetid, bloated corpse of Silverx-2013 floating downstream is any indication, SatsuAyaka might want to hurry up and dive underwater!
Whelp, she waited too long and got stung. SatsuAyaka eventually gave up the charade after being unable to withstand Cheeyev's faggotry any longer, admitted her undying hatred for Cheeyev and now openly mocks him. SatsuAyaka did make a legitimate attempt at peace however, even though she abhors the supreme jerk.
His reaction to finding this page
Just like a certain other lolcow, when Cheeyev found out that he had a page on him, he cried incessantly about it. He now proceeds to tell everyone he ever meets that he has an article in his name, which only serves to drive people even further away from him.
How to be like Cheeyev!
Use this handy-dandy guide, and you too can become a wonderful whiny whingebag like Cheeyev!
- Step 1: Give random premium memberships to people who barely know you, or who like you but are preoccupied with other things.
- Step 2: Ignore the fact that what you did was effectively give a gift to someone, and therefore you should expect nothing in return. Especially ignore that last part.
- Step 3: BAWWWWWW when you don't get anything in return. Maybe shit your pants a few times too.
- Step 4: Make sure to make the person to whom you gave the 'gift' feel as uncomfortable as possible, to the point of them blocking you.
- Step 5: Post a journal about how upset you are, and don't forget to demonize the person to whom you gave the gift!
Even Cheeyev hates Cheeyev
While Cheeyev incessantly talks about physically harming himself and threatening suicide, it's the verbal self-deprecating comments in which he excels. Lest you think that he only annoys you and other non-teenagers who read his writings, here is a small (small, because posting them all would take up too much bandwidth for Encyclopedia Dramatica to run properly) sampling of what Cheeyev says about himself.
Previous Quote | Next Quote
Supporters
Could one boy be so obnoxious on his own? Maybe not, but Cheeyev has legions of adolescent fanboys at his beck and call, ready to do battle with anyone who besmirches his good name. Currently sitting at 1,204 watchers, this group, sometimes referred to as the "Boo Hoo Brigade," will crapflood users whom Cheeyev calls out in his journals. No matter how many journals their lord and savior pinches out of his anus, they never seem to catch on that it is he who is the problem.
"Hate accounts"
Just as the boy has his legion of white-knights baying for blood, a select clique of users have set out to attack his legion of snotty cry-babies following his every move, as well as go for the heart of the chaos itself, being the crybaby who runs it all. Most of them wilt within a few days, but as of March 2015, a single account remains - 
CheeyevTheCharlatanAlthough he too has chosen to end the lulz involved in stirring Cheeyev's legions, he has yet to deactivate. Most accounts who offer even a shred of constructive criticism get blocked by him. Only those who lick the ground he walks upon are allowed to stay.
Epic hissy fit
Like any other good attention whore, Cheeyev loves to pretend to storm off of DeviantArt in a snit, only to quickly return. The routine goes: Post a journal announcing you're leaving, deactivate, take advantage of DeviantArt's 30-day grace period to return, fans rejoice! This has been used by so many looking for asspats, but this was Cheeyev's fourth time doing this, showing how desperate he is for attention.
In his incoherent rant, Cheeyev displays how delusional he is by blaming a few select members for everybody disliking him, rather than his own abrasive personality. He also violated D.A. policy with probably his thirtieth call-out of said members, but the rules don't seem to apply to him.
Look for the triumphant return of newly-dubbed Sir Wankshaft McShitstain to D.A. shortly, hopefully soon.
The "Great" Suspension of May 2015 - rejoice?
As of the 7th of May 2015, Cheeyev's account has been suspended. Finally, DeviantArt's backwards team appeared to have done something about him! Much BAWWing was had, and many of his supposed haters are breathed a collective sigh of relief. As expected, his Boo Hoo Brigade have stormed through, and the mother of all the snotty-nosed children, Liepardmon555, now claims to be his 'DeviantArt Mother.' I shit you not. Hopefully, DeviantArt will eventually rid him from the website for good, but as of now, only time will tell.
Update: It was not to be, as Cheeyev returned to no fanfare less than a week later, and revealed that DeviantArt had only given him a five-day suspension.
On YouTube
Cheeyev recently joined JewTube. His first and so-far only video, posted on December 29, 2013, is the usual butthurt we've come to expect from our favorite tranny, just in audio format! Enjoy before it is bawleeted.
On SMWCentral
Bizarrely, the only website where Cheeyev's BAWWWING hasn't surfaced is the breeding ground for weebs and homos, SMWCentral. He has one hack in progress which actually seems rather decent. Why he focuses more on art theft than his rudimentary coding skills has yet to be explained.
Gallery
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Cheeyev's lovely art. -
Not altered. -
Cheeyev after his parents got sick of his spam journals. -
A collage of lulz.
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Because one of the first things you do when people want to see more of you is show them your ugly, diseased foot. Bon appetit, Foot fetishists! -
Cheeyev's creepy eyes prevent him from knowing how to rotate an image. -
A D.A. member offers Cheeyev a helpful link (top-right). -
Well, the first step is admitting it. -
In the same quick flash in time: D.A. and E.D. simultaneously confirm Cheeyev is the Devil. -
Bawwwww Bunny is a rank amateur when compared to Cheeyev. -
Quotes. -
How Cheeyev was born. -
Liepardmon tries to rally support. Take note of the mock-patriotic title, the likes of which you would see in any dictatorship, and the complete absence of comments. -
Cheeyev: "Eventually, once I reach the pinnacle of depression, I resort to attempting to lacerate myself, but I always fail and I can't make a real cut, so who cares?" -
Cheeyev: "My haters and depression lead me to do this, and I succeeded..." -
Sure they do, you post about it multiple times a day!
See also
- Attention whore
- BAWWWWW
- Chasethehedgehog
- DestinyMew
- DeviantArt
- Eddboy
- Loser
- Mintchoco
- Shawn XYZ Beast
- Yuethedragon
External links
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Cheeyev is part of a series on Visit the DeviantART Portal for complete coverage. |
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Cheeyev is part of a series on </3 EMO </3 [Cut] |
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