Tyler Lumar

Tyler A. Lumar was a 22-year-old asthmatic Africunt-American father of one who, in the summer of 2016, went to the doctor to get some prescription cough medicine that he totally wasn't planning to sell on the streets or use in the production of methamphetamine. After the doctor said "No more monkeys jumping on the bed!" and refused to write the prescription, Lumar responded by threatening to shoot up the doctor's office and then started screaming incoherently about "racism". After the Chicago police arrived, they quickly determined that arresting Lumar for making blatant terrorist threats would look bad since he was black and had the race card. The police instead decided to arrest him for a $25 parking ticket that their computer networks still had marked as unpaid despite the fact that Lumar actually had paid it.

After arriving at jail, police added a possession of crack cocaine charge as a result of Lumar's ninja cellmate stealthily tossing a crack bag that he had hidden in his shoe. Less than 24 hours after his arrest, Lumar decided to do what all angry black guys do and took his shirt off – then he attempted to hang himself with it in an attempt to get away from his family like a typical black father. After being rescued by the big, bad, white supremacist policemen at the jail, it soon became apparent that Lumar had both failed to kill himself and failed to not kill himself as he was now a bigger vegetable than Terri Schiavo in a carrot suit.

On April 18, 2018, after almost two years of hogging up a hospital bed that could have been occupied by some kid with cancer, Lumar finally decided to die for real. Cue the outrage from groups such as Black Lives Matter and professional white boi Shaun King who quickly attempted to turn Tyler Lumar into yet another shitty martyr that they could use to peddle their typical racist anti-police propaganda. Never mind the fact that it was Lumar's own selfish act of cowardice that left him fucking dead, and let's not even talk about how he had THREATENED TO SHOOT UP A DOCTOR'S OFFICE.

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