David Buckel

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David S. Buckel was a 60-year-old gay rights lawyer and tree hugger who, on April 14, 2018, gave new meaning to the term "flaming faggot" when he doused himself in horrible fossil fuels and then lit himself on fire like a Vietnamese monk in order to protest global warming or some other bleeding heart shit like that.

Boys Don't Cry (Unless They're On Fire)

File:BrandonTeena.jpg
Brandon Teena

Before making a name for himself as the X-Man The Human Barbecue, Davis S. Buckel was most well known for being the lead lawyer in a lolsuit against Richardson County Nebraska and Sheriff Charles B. Laux following a triple murder that was highly publicized because it involved an FTM tranny and none of the perpetrators were black.

Brandon Teena (Deadname: Teena Renae Brandon) was a 21-year-old bulldyke who got raped by two disgusting ex-con rednecks named John L. Lotter and Marvin Thomas Nissen and then went to the police. Unfortunately for Brandon, Sheriff Charles B. Laux was too interested in his mangina and didn't arrest the two crackers due to a lack of evidence. After finding out that Brandon was a fucking snitch, Lotter and Nissen then ended up murdering Brandon and two of his acquaintances.

BURN, BABY! BURN!

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I'm David Buckel and welcome to Jackass!


   
 
My name is David Buckel and I just killed myself by fire as a protest suicide. I apologize to you for the mess.
 

 
 

—I am David Buckel and I am retarded


   
 
My early death by fossil fuel reflects what we are doing to ourselves.
 

 
 

—Kentucky Fried Buckel

Reactions From Retards

   
 
I mourn for Buckel, who gave his life to demonstrate how our lifestyle and addiction to fossil fuels are harming people and the planet. May we honor him by stopping using oil, gas, and coal, and creating the economy and society he envisioned.
 

 
 

—Clair Brown, Professor of Economics at Berkeley (archive)

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