Lee Rigby
—Where're your lands, mate? Romford? |
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On Wednesday, May 22nd, 2013, two Muslim negros decided that it would an awesome idea to run over a British soldier in a car, butcher him to death and then try to decapitate him. In a busy London street. In broad daylight.
After this happened, the fine folks at /b/ amongst other denizens of the Internets such as YouTube and Facebook raeged hard at the Islamic community and called for the prompt expulsion and/or execution of all Muslims on the grounds that "it's better to be safe than sorry."
The victim
Lee Rigby was a soldier for the Queen's army of baton twirlers. Rigby was on his way to the gay bathhouse, and thought the two men were driving toward him to pick him up for some afternoon buttsex. Little did he realize that they actually wanted head.
The attackers
The two men who attacked Rigby were two niggers called Ian Michael, Michael 'Mujahid' Olumide Adebolajo and Michael Oluwatobi Adebowale. These men were welcomed into Londonistan with open arms by gullible poofsters who thought that giving a better life to nig-nogs was a dandy fine idea.
Londonistan
Woolwich is a suburb of London, so what better place to re-settle these two refugees than in a white suburb of welcoming white people! Nothing could possibly go wrong.
Homeland?
The upstanding young refugees described atrocities in their homeland as the reason for beheading young Lee Rigby. However, it is worth noting that in the now infamous clip that's doing the rounds on several news sites, where a blood-soaked Adebolajo addresses the public, he speaks with a clear Romford accent, meaning that rather than the Middle East, his homeland is actually Essex.
Videos
Immediately after carving up the Queen's private drummer, one of the niggers gave an interview to an enterprising YouTuber, still holding the weapons and drenched in Rigby's blood.
Michael Adebolajo addresses teh Internets.
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Justice
England is not known for having a lot of guns, but when it comes to shooting niggers, even the Brits like to have a little target practice.
Aftermath
The people of Britain were utterly disgusted by this display of barbarity, and promptly proceeded to write disgruntled letters to their local council members, urging them, in turn, to write disgruntled letters to their own superiors, and so on.
One group of individuals, however, was even more miffed than the general British public themselves; the Gay Cracker Association of Britain, also known as the English Defence League, was thoroughly peeved by the incident.
Gathering up all the titanium dildos and GRIDS-laced shuriken that they could possibly carry in their anal cavities, they proceeded to band together at their local YMCA. Having engaged in a few hours of recreation, the EDL had made a decision: enough, was enough. They could no longer sit idly by and watch the United Kingdom fall victim to illiteracy and barbarism; it was time to stand up! They marched on Woolwich, putting the Mardi Gras to shame with their pride, and made sure their voices were heard, with a firebombing of a local mosque emphasising their opposition to violence. Unfortunately, however, the march didn't last long before the EDL succumbed to a passionate game of "love truncheon" with the local police. A few of the hot bodied protesters gave in to their animal instincts and accompanied some police officers home that evening. Other than that, however, nothing happened.
See also