Michael Savage
Michael AlanWeiner✡ (no, seriously that's his actual name) is a short, obese, self-loathing homosexual Jew, better known by his badass WoW screen name, Michael Savage. He hosts the nationally-syndicated American radio show, The Savage Nation in America. He's American. He's conservative. He burns Muslims and eats autistic children. He hates everything except plants, shitty heavy metal music, and cock (any type). He especially hates YOU. He was recently banned from Great Britain for being what the British government called "a bit too poofy, even for us."
Typical Savage listeners have an IQ of approximately 47, and believe they are going against the grain by listening to a fat Jewish plant doctor who pretends to be a redneck, when, in fact most are clinically retarded. Most of them fail to realize that he was actually a former liberal homosexual in San Francisco, but became a conservative because Allen Ginsberg✡ refused to give him head one night at a party. He claims he was never a gay man, but frequently discusses his favorite types of sausage on his brilliant program. His faggot son invented the horrible beverage Rock Star Energy Drink (which literally tastes like urine) and dresses in a distinctively faggoty manner. Clearly the apple did not fall far from the tree, amirite?
Savage admitting to rampant faggotry
W̶e̶i̶n̶e̶r̶✡ "Savage" admitting to Skinny-dipping with a bunch of beatnik faggots in Fiji, and posing for a Pr0n shoot with the gay pedophile Alan Ginsberg.
A Typical Episode of His Show
—Michael Savage, engaging in his standards of a valid argument | ||
He then goes on to bitch about all the world's problems, most commonly:
- Why hasn't the Middle East been nuked from orbit?
- Why can't Israel commit mass genocide to Palestine, Gaza or *insert some other Middle Eastern shithole*?
- Him bitching about getting kicked off MSNBC and being banned from the UK.
- Him complaining why we can't ethnically cleanse Arabs.
- Him talking about how dangerous weed is (as he went on to smoke a staggering array of cock after smoking his first joint). Once in a while, he'll even SCREAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM ABOUT HOW MARIJUANA IS THE MOST DANGEROUS OF ALL DRUGS (actual quote)
Savage And The Internets
—Michael Savage | ||
Mr. Savage is a badass mofo, and loves him some free speech. This is exactly why other online entities are not allowed to pose any negative opinions. Don't believe me? You're probably a left-wing fascist.
Savage and Aspies
Savage has also aroused the ire of the aspie community, causing a fuckton of butthurt on the Internets. Last Thursday, Savage made the claim that kids with autism and their parents were part of a vast liberal conspiracy to collect welfare checks from the Government. This is because Savage not only hates kids with autism, but he hates poor people as well. All this stems from the fact that Michael is in fact a retarded Shylock growing up a poor Jew raped every night by his ugly greaseball father. Like most well-meaning people, Savage asserted that the following comments were taken out of context, by liberals seeking to have Savage's show removed from the airwaves:
—Dr. Savage's educated assertion of autism and its effects on behavior in children | ||
—Michael Savage, being a self-loathing fucking douchebag | ||
Butthurt ensued. Within days, as TOW reports, a steady stream of parents and grandparents of retards lined up at Savage's New York radio studio, and angrily protested. Companies that once sponsored the airtime that Savage's show worked on quickly withdrew support, and Savage decided to dedicate his next show to confronting offended parents. This, of course made for great justice on the part of some parents who had been seriously offended by Savage's santorum-coated comments:
— Brian Schweitzer, governor of The Great State of Montana and father of a retard, epitomizing NO U | ||
Several rich and beautiful celebrity parents of asspies issued statements filled with BAWWW, most notably the black person and the dumb bimbo who married Jim Carrey.
—Holly Robinson-Peete and Rodney Peete, a.k.a. Mr. and Mrs. BAWWW | ||
Savage, meanwhile, has retreated to the safe haven of his beloved blog, where to the frunz of his Republican fanboys who would give all of their precious Social Security money to have one drop of precum from his enormous e-penis, he made a half-hearted apology. As Michael Savage is a lolcow of the first order, he also has been prone to foot-in-mouth disease, which has been known to afflict other old media commentators as well. This was evidenced by an assertive NO U comment on the aforementioned blog:
—Michael Savage, failing miserably, lol | ||
Savage's production company, in their half-assed attempt to save advertising dollars, set up a webpage containing over 9000 audio comments from Savage's show on autism. This webpage also contains a defensive TL;DR statement by Savage's production company in an attempt at clarification. Nonetheless, the over 9000 clips on the webpage not only outline Savage's views on asspies, but also expose Savage's malignant douchebaggery at attempting to even seem slightly compassionate about the subject of autism. If there is anything to be learned of this situation, it is that Michael Savage must be brutally raped for great justice, so that people like Chris-chan can finally be left to their own asspie freedoms, saving us from having to deal with their furry tendencies later in life.
Savage vs O'Reilly
Savage has been known to attack other conservative radio talk show hosts such as Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Glenn Beck and Bill O'Reilly, on the basis of his opinion that they are either not true conservatives or are mere mouthpieces for the GOP. He is known in particular for his beef with O'Reilly, who started the fire by attacking his website content on his Fox News show:
Savage Likes Scifags
As of January 5th, after young Travolta died, Michael has voiced his outright support for Scifags. He even gave a book to one. And thus, Savage fans are forever mortified.
Expect funny calls in the following weeks from SeaOrgs.
England Drops The Banhammer on Savage
Savage is currently permabanned from the UK. The result was much bawing among butthurt Republicans and conservatives. He's been constantly bitching about this on his radio show ever since.
Savage Loves The Cock
—Michael Weiner | ||
There is also rumored to be a photograph of him swimming nude in Fiji with Allen Ginsberg.
—Michael Weiner, Vital Signs | ||
List of People Michael Savage Has Insulted in This Article
Moar Links
- Michael Savage's Official Website
- Michael Savage (commentator) on Wikipedia
- Michael Savage Hates Muslims
- Michael Savage's Rant About Autism
- Michael Savage knows that Faggots & Dykes did WTC, not Jews.
See Also
- Conservativism
- Internet Tough Guy
- Rush Limbaugh
- Fallacious Reasoning
- Jew
- Troll
- San Francisco
- Short
- Persecution Complex - He bawwws for the 'White Christian Male' power-structure
- Redneck (fanbase)
- White Trash (also his #1 fans)
- Alt-right (another fanbase, even though he has no idea who they are)
| Michael Savage is part of a series on Gay Republicans [OPEN THE CLOSET!]
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