Matt Sanchez
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Matt "Dirty" Sanchez is a rightard blawgger, commentator, independant journalist, and Marine reservist. He is also a faggot ex-manwhore and gay porn star. Liberals laugh at him and his flaming American penis. He is also one ugly motherfucker.
Early Life
Matt Sanchez, aka Rod Majors, aka Pierre LaBranche was born in 1970. As a young man he appeared in such fine films as Montreal Men, Jawbreaker, Touched by an Anal, and many others. [1] He also worked as a "masseuse", where he provided "excellent top" quality rubdowns for a mere $200, $250 outcall. [2]
Sanchez eventually became disillusioned with the world of faggotry and the spreading of AIDS. He joined the Marines and converted to a born again Republican rightard. After he was discharged from the Marines for having too much AIDS he decided to go to college.
Political Activism and National Recognition
One day while he attended classes at Columbia, Sanchez was accosted by by a herd of hippy leftards. They called him stupid and "baby-killer," and made fun of him for being a Mexican (proving indeed that liberals are racist hypocrites). Instead of being a man about it, by raeping their throats until he crushed their larynxes with his massive schlong, he had to be a big gaywad and go file a formal complaint with the University. When he was ignored by the school, he took his complaint to Fox News.
Sanchez' impassioned pleas for tolerance eventually gained him national recognition from such rightard luminaries as Ann Coulter, Bill O'Reilly , Sean Hannity, Michelle Malkin, and Newt Gingrich. He was awarded the first ever America, Fuck Yeah, Super-Patriot!!!! Award.
Then the details of his sordid past became public. Lulz ensued.
Sanchez and Wikipedia
Matt Sanchez is butthurt, because he can't control what goes into his own Wikipedia page. [3]
—Matt Sanchez on his Wikipedia page. |
—some dude in response |
Facercise
Sanchez in Iraq
Sanchez is currently working as an embedded journalist in Iraq. He was one of the first people to expose on his blawg that Pvt Scott Thomas Beauchamp was full of shit. Some argue that he may have also raeped Pvt Beauchamp, though that has yet to be corroborated.
Matt Sanchez is part of a series on Gay Republicans [OPEN THE CLOSET!]
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