Liberia: Difference between revisions
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Liberia ("land of freedom"; real original, guys) is a colony of [[retard|Americanized]] [[nigger|negroes]] in [[Africa]] which was founded in the 19th century when a runaway black person called Tyrone-Jenkins-Jamal-Montel III got funding from some [[America|stupid rich white men]] to buy land in [[Africa]]. This was (and still is) known by [[fucktard]]s as "returning to the [[AIDS|motherland]]," as if the fact that the people in Africa are also [[black]] made it a good idea, even though this makes about as much sense as going up to a random man in [[Japan]] and saying "hey, we've both got [[cock]]s; let's be [[BFF]]!!![[one|11]]. Shockingly, these retarded founders found themselves surrounded by totally unrelated breeds of black person who wanted to boil them in [[oil]]. The Liberians, being partly [[white]] due to [[rape]] and thus marginally more intelligent, repeatedly [[pwned]] the natives in many glorious [[victory|victories]] to advance the cause of [[freedom]]. | Liberia ("land of freedom"; real original, guys) is a colony of [[retard|Americanized]] [[nigger|negroes]] in [[Africa]] which was founded in the 19th century when a runaway black person called Tyrone-Jenkins-Jamal-Montel III got funding from some [[America|stupid rich white men]] to buy land in [[Africa]]. This was (and still is) known by [[fucktard]]s as "returning to the [[AIDS|motherland]]," as if the fact that the people in Africa are also [[black]] made it a good idea, even though this makes about as much sense as going up to a random man in [[Japan]] and saying "hey, we've both got [[cock]]s; let's be [[BFF]]!!![[one|11]]. Shockingly, these retarded founders found themselves surrounded by totally unrelated breeds of black person who wanted to boil them in [[oil]]. The Liberians, being partly [[white]] due to [[rape]] and thus marginally more intelligent, repeatedly [[pwned]] the natives in many glorious [[victory|victories]] to advance the cause of [[freedom]]. | ||
Fun fact: They named their capital Monrovia after President James Monroe, because he was very eager to see them [[GTFO]]. | |||
[[Image:Liberianchild.jpg|thumb|right|Liberia's bright young future.]][[Image:Liberiantechnology.jpg|thumb|right|One of the latest developments in Liberian technology.]] | [[Image:Liberianchild.jpg|thumb|right|Liberia's bright young future.]][[Image:Liberiantechnology.jpg|thumb|right|One of the latest developments in Liberian technology.]] | ||
==Claims to Fame== | ==Claims to Fame== | ||
Liberia's name does actually translate to "Land of the Free" in Latin. As a result, Liberia has been the proud holder of the record for biggest nation-wide irony. | Liberia's name does actually translate to "Land of the Free" in Latin. As a result, Liberia has been the proud holder of the record for biggest nation-wide irony. If you are a white person who goes there, you will be promptly arrested until you come up with enough cash to bribe your way out of the jail. Start the bidding at $20. | ||
==More recent shenanigans== | ==More recent shenanigans== | ||
Liberia has had | Liberia has had two civil wars in the past two decades, for a total of 11 years of war since 1989, as a result of which they now have many lovely creatures like the one at right, an average life expectancy of 40[https://www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/geos/li.html#People], an 85% unemployment rate[https://www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/geos/li.html#Econ], and a grand total of 5 internet hosts[https://www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/geos/li.html#Comm]. [[Gg]]. [[General Butt Naked]], the cannibal general and soccer innovator, was Warlord of the Year for six consecutive years until he became friends with Jesus. | ||
Their latest former president Charles Taylor is on trial for 650 counts of war crimes during the latter war, but it could have just been some guy who looked like him. | |||
According to [http://www.fol.org/ these people], Liberia has 800 friends, putting it slightly ahead of [[Jameth]] and [[Weev]]. Retards who think Liberia was a good idea can be found at {{ljcomm|back_to_africa}}. | According to [http://www.fol.org/ these people], Liberia has 800 friends, putting it slightly ahead of [[Jameth]] and [[Weev]]. Retards who think Liberia was a good idea can be found at {{ljcomm|back_to_africa}}. | ||
In 2014 a woman from Liberian crossed the border to Guinea to attend the funeral of an [[Ebola]] victim, and to touch and rub herself repeatedly against the recently | |||
In 2014 a woman from Liberian crossed the border to Guinea to attend the funeral of an [[Ebola]] victim, and to touch and rub herself repeatedly against the recently deceased person's body as tradition dictates. She then came back to Liberia where she infected her whole village. Ebola has now reached the capital, Monrovia, where people have taken to believe that the virus doesn't exist, just another lie of the [[White]] Man. This has resulted in quarantined persons being "liberated" by angry mobs and the outbreak to reach previously unthinkable proportions for an urban center. These are the same people that used to believe that nakedness made them bulletproof. | |||
==Still wanna go to Liberia?== | |||
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRuSS0iiFyo VICE doc on the Land of Freedom featuring people shitting on the beaches] | |||
{{Afro}} | {{Afro}} | ||
<br> | <br> | ||
{{Commonwealth}} | {{Commonwealth}} | ||
[[Category:Locations]] | [[Category:Locations]] | ||
Revision as of 00:23, 25 January 2015
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Early history
Liberia ("land of freedom"; real original, guys) is a colony of Americanized negroes in Africa which was founded in the 19th century when a runaway black person called Tyrone-Jenkins-Jamal-Montel III got funding from some stupid rich white men to buy land in Africa. This was (and still is) known by fucktards as "returning to the motherland," as if the fact that the people in Africa are also black made it a good idea, even though this makes about as much sense as going up to a random man in Japan and saying "hey, we've both got cocks; let's be BFF!!!11. Shockingly, these retarded founders found themselves surrounded by totally unrelated breeds of black person who wanted to boil them in oil. The Liberians, being partly white due to rape and thus marginally more intelligent, repeatedly pwned the natives in many glorious victories to advance the cause of freedom.
Fun fact: They named their capital Monrovia after President James Monroe, because he was very eager to see them GTFO.
Claims to Fame
Liberia's name does actually translate to "Land of the Free" in Latin. As a result, Liberia has been the proud holder of the record for biggest nation-wide irony. If you are a white person who goes there, you will be promptly arrested until you come up with enough cash to bribe your way out of the jail. Start the bidding at $20.
More recent shenanigans
Liberia has had two civil wars in the past two decades, for a total of 11 years of war since 1989, as a result of which they now have many lovely creatures like the one at right, an average life expectancy of 40[1], an 85% unemployment rate[2], and a grand total of 5 internet hosts[3]. Gg. General Butt Naked, the cannibal general and soccer innovator, was Warlord of the Year for six consecutive years until he became friends with Jesus.
Their latest former president Charles Taylor is on trial for 650 counts of war crimes during the latter war, but it could have just been some guy who looked like him.
According to these people, Liberia has 800 friends, putting it slightly ahead of Jameth and Weev. Retards who think Liberia was a good idea can be found at 
back_to_africa.
In 2014 a woman from Liberian crossed the border to Guinea to attend the funeral of an Ebola victim, and to touch and rub herself repeatedly against the recently deceased person's body as tradition dictates. She then came back to Liberia where she infected her whole village. Ebola has now reached the capital, Monrovia, where people have taken to believe that the virus doesn't exist, just another lie of the White Man. This has resulted in quarantined persons being "liberated" by angry mobs and the outbreak to reach previously unthinkable proportions for an urban center. These are the same people that used to believe that nakedness made them bulletproof.
Still wanna go to Liberia?
