Sarah Silverman

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DON'T SHIT THRU YOUR PANTIES YA DUMBASS

Sarah Silverman, better known as that Jew slut next door, is a unfunny female comedian who breaks through the adversities of living in a man's world by delivering shitty and obvious shit to television audiences. She is truly a shining example of how anal sex and giving blowjobs to Hollywood executives can earn you a place among comedy greats. Sarah Silverman is 53, but, like Demetri Martin, wants you to believe she is closer to 25. She's perhaps better known as being the most fapped to person on Comedy Central, despite Carlos Mencia having bigger tits. She started off as SNL's bitch, but due to her having no comedic aspects she was fired on her second day working the fax machine there, probably due to the fact that she wasn't able to suck cock fast enough. Being freakishly cute, having a squeaky cartoon voice, and being extremely hairy in the wrong places didn't help (much).

The tramp had to find another tit to suck off. She tried Seinfeld, Star Trek, Greg the Bunny, and about thirty other low budget TV shows found on broadcast television and basic cable. Sarah keeps doing this to gain attention, because honestly, no one gives a shit about her and she will most likely die alone.

Protip and big surprise: She went nude in a dumb Sarah Polley "dramedy" called Take This Waltz, in which she had a shower scene. No one watched it, nor gave a shit, but obviously many lonely virgins fapped and cried, because they weren't in the shower with her. They wanted the tiny hairy boobs, and were denied.

Comedy style

Sarah, like nearly all female comedians, is not funny, but is famous because he is a slut. Her "comedy" consists of shitty racism, poop jokes, and of course, the calling card of the female comedian: "LOOK AT ME I'M A WOMAN NIGGERNIGGER HURP DURP". If someone tries to tell you that Sarah Silverman is funny, they probably like penis and men too, so do us all a favor and beat the living shit out of them and proceed to kill him with fire.

There's no better job for a helium-voiced Heeb duckface than cartoon voice-overs, so she ended up doing things like Wreck-It Ralph, The Simpsons and Bob's Burgers. "Serious Hollywood" can't find other uses for her. Being run by Jew fags and liars, it needs good-looking and stupid-exploitable Caucasian-northern-European types for the shitty action flicks. Business is business, oy!

LOLCANCELED

The Sarah Silverman Program was canceled some time ago for being a crappy sitcom about a Jewish retard with a Chihuahua. Something only you would watch. The show featured a cast of shitty characters including hairy gay men (who weren't even the hairiest things on the show), a cop, and other Jews and dogs. Sarah gets into numerous adventures such as pissing in her bed, talking to fish, and ass raping random men. Now who wouldn't cancel this shit? -- even Comedy Central doesn't get it.

She hired her sister, she hired her disgusting stanky standup buddies like Brian Posehn and Jay Johnston, she sucked and gobbled the tiny Hebraic peepers of Viacom head Sumner "Oy!" Redstone. All pointless. It lasted 32 episodes and vanished like a gefilte-fish turd in the East River.

After that flopped, she started a YouTube channel called "JASH" with some other faggy retard "comedians". And they started posting videos that were apparently rejected by other outlets. Lulz are to be had (but not from the actual content of the videos). Tim and Eric still suck.

Fake wage gap story

Since Silverman is the Jewest of Jews, she didn't feel like she was getting paid high enough for her work. So she needed to fabricate a story where she was actually paid less than her male Jewish counterparts. In this story, she claimed she only received ten bucks for a gig, whereas the guy got paid $60. Of course, this Jew bitch was only telling half the story.

Because nobody back then, as now, gave two shits about Silverman, she wasn't booked. Of course it is common procedure in show-business that if you aren't booked, you ain't gotta get paid. But the Jewgress didn't give a shit. She wanted the gold. So she was paid $10, so she could fuck off. Of course this was more than fifteen years ago, and like a true Jew, Sarah has held a grudge for $50. A Jew whose net worth is several millions.

Receiving Twitter harassment

In a desperate attempt to make the previous story go away (about lying through her crooked Jew teeth), she decided to bawl like a bitch, over a Twitter account called Cbanks420lol. It said "I hope you get cervical cancer". She even thought Carlton was Jesus. You'd think a heeb would recognize another heeb. Of course her retarded fans consisting of 14-year-old girls and fat virgin guys hoping for a shot at her Jew pussy, quickly came to defend her from that vicious attack.

So, here is our suggestion Sarah:

   
 
Great News! If you quit being cunty the whole world will stop being against you!
 

 
 

She's not funny

All of this lame, sad bullshit came from her Twitter, so choke on it.

   
 
just woke up from a dream where I had a baby that I named la luz.


 


 
 

—Sarah Silverman

   
 
To those using Jesus' name to justify hate & intolerance: if He was here He &I would be bros & u would totally bum him out


 


 
 

—Sarah Silverman

   
 
New favorite show: THE SECRET LIFE OF FOUR YEAR OLDS. Find it. Watch it.


 


 
 

—Sarah Silverman

   
 
it sounds like someone's emptying a bag of bowling balls onto the floor in the apt above me yes that must be what it is


 


 
 

—Sarah Silverman

   
 
Poopy doody pee poo bloo shoo dee doo


 


 
 

—Sarah Silverman

   
 
It's hard to keep track of all my safe words


 


 
 

—Sarah Silverman

Images

When you hear people say "she's hot" remember the following pictures:

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Videos

Sarah finds a new fetish

A sample of her shitty comedy and Jewishness.

A sample of her crappy show. Note that Pedobear is hiding in the background.

Somehow managing to make even Adolf Hitler come off as unfunny

See also

External links

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