Bunlckr

Note: this is an article about an Encyclopedia Dramatica user. For more information, please see the appropriate user page. To leave this user a message, please visit their talk page.

Bunlckr (also called Asslckr, Cocklckr, Dicklckr, take your pick) is total faggot who made himself a bad name on ED for being outright fucking retarded. On May 15th, 2008, some butthurt faggot by the username of (El-Kaneo) thought that he could get internet revenge on his ex-girlfriend by posting a picture of her on ED, which is a sad combination of retarded and pathetic.

A month later, Bunlckr, who was now with the Emo bitch, discovered his new girlfriend's pic on ED's Emo page and decided he would flex his obvious internet mastery and fix the situation. However, rather than simply going through the proper channels to get the picture removed, Asslckr decided that he would take matters into his own hands.

OH NOES!!

First, Asslckr decided to put on his best tough guy face and vandalized El-kaneo's userpage.

"El-Kaneo, also known as Kane, also known as dickhead... a resident of singleton lives in greenwood avenue... telling you his house number would be... well least of all dangerous most of all fun...

he seems to have a problem with me... and my girlfriend... i think thats because he thinks she cheated on him
with me... completely and entirely not true dickweed.... she left you, thats all...

its certainly not reason enough to upload an image to a public website depicting her as an emo... besides being illegal... its also put a target on ur head... well dont worry buddy... i'll be paying you a visit soon enough...

enroll urself in the school of hard knocks... cause i'll be instructing u soon...
(sic.)"

Yeah, like anyone gives a shit about some random faggot on the internet enough to go down to this guys house.

He then deleted the pic from the Emo page, not once but twice. The second time, he showed off his awesome wikiskillz, when he attempted to replace the photo by linking directly to his photobucket. PROTIP: if you don't want people to fuck with you, then don't link to your public Photobucket album.

The picture he tried to link to was the following:

I'm sure Interpol will get right on that. Ironically, none of these things are illegal, however making serious threats of physical violence on the internet is.

Finally, Asslkr tried to blank the picture itself three fucking times, each time being cock blocked by ED's superior security software. At this point SecurityBot had put up with enough of his fail, and raeped him for his faggotry.

Remember kids, the internet is serious business.

Begging for mercy

SMS profile with his girlfriend's IRL name. Way to fail, retard.

After being booted, Bunlckr emailed WhiteMystery for assistance, which is what he should have done IN THE FIRST PLACE:

	“	hello, im sorry im a ED nub and was trying to remove a picture of my girlfriend from this site. I'd like to be unbanned but i know that this might not happen. But i would like to request that this image is deleted http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Image:Emo-bitch.jpg please and thankyou. hope to be unbanned and image deleted soon.	„
	— "Michael"

WM took immediate action and promptly ignored him. Two days later he sent another message under the impression that he was actually going to be unbanned and that he had been banned a second time. Either that, or he's a fucking liar.

	“	ok white mystery this seems to be the second time security bot has banned me. i'm not purposely trying to vandalise this site mate. im just trying to remove pictures of my girlfriend. it has offended me A LOT to see her on here. i just want the image removed. please. you can remove the page about me and the page about El-Kaneo if you want i dont mind if you dont unban me but please remove the image. please. you will find it on my user page because someone "buttraped" my page	„
	— Face McPalm, Private Detective.

After that pathetic display, it was obvious that there was only one reasonable course of action.

Most of the pictures on this page were ripped directly from his publicly open Photobucket, including another picture of his girlfriend Erin (see top of page). Furthermore, this idiot was also stupid enough to leave a plethora of personal information just lying about on the internet, as you will see below.

Google that shit!

On his user page, Asslckr openly invites you to Google his name as he is clearly hot shit.

"[Bunlckr] is the shortened form of Hypnotic Bun Licker.
Is a username used by Michael.
Google searching bunlckr will return results all pertaining to me. lol.
I play various games like Counter-Strike
im an australian boy. that'll do..."

We kindly took him up on his offer:

Michael Gray

Born: 08-10-1992

Newcastle, New South Wales, AUS.

http://s77.photobucket.com/albums/j60/BunLckr/ - photobucket, now private LOL.

http://www.myspace.com/storm1992 - MySpace, private

http://www.smsfun.co.uk/bunlckr - SMS profile, public

http://www.youtube.com/user/Bunlckr - NOW CLOSED.

http://www.bunlckr.byethost7.com - Bunlckr's personal site: IT'S A TRAP.

[email protected] - email#1

[email protected] - email#2

bunlckr - AIM

Nickname = "Storm"

Likes Counter-strike, Sonic the Hedgehog, and Furry pr0n.

Upload that Shit!

Bunlckr Gallery About missing Pics

Bunlckr, aka Asslckr.
Erin.
Let the good times roll.
Bunlckr's attempt at art.

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

After looking through his bucket, we discovered that bunlckr was ZOMG CHEATING ON ERIN.
His plans to become an hero.
Asslckr is a fucking sonicfag.
Also found in his photobucket
More furry shit.
Bunlckr likes it in the ass.
El Kaneo's "art".
Just the kind of retard you would expect to find at I Can Has Cheezburger?
The irony of this pic is palpable.
Bunlckr's own popular gaming forum.
Just check out those stats!
El-kaneo, camwhoring it up on /b/

Google that shit now, fucker!

Use scrollbar to see the full image

Update: El-Kaneo does not liek

On July 28th, 2008, El Kaneo finally took notice of the page dedicated to his pathetic excuse for internet use. He decided, obviously not learning a single lesson from the story on this page, that he would go face-to-face with Encyclopedia Dramatica's mighty SecurityBot. The results were, as expected, unsurprising: