Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg
Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg is a Glover knockoff made by the nips at SEGA for the Nintendo GameCube in 2003, starring a... well, just look at him. He's the very personification of an Asspie and something that would make you think of Chris Chan. Some pedophile had probably been snorting coke that day, and while under the influence had began performing bestiality on roosters. That's when they decided, "Hey! Let's take Mattel's Glover, which was already shit to begin with, and add fucking chicken kids rolling big eggs around!" And thus, Billy Hatcher was conceived.
Plot
In Morning Land, a world inhabited by chickens, a massive flock of evil crows engulf the land into darkness and terrorize the community. Meanwhile in the human world, Billy Hatcher is planning a four-way orgy with his only friends when suddenly a half-dead chick begins to chirp, prompting Billy to save it from being ræped and murdered by some crows. Billy pwns the crow (which is revealed to be a stick), and the chick begins to glow, teleporting him and his fuckbuddies into Morning Land. The God of the chickens, Menie-Funie, chooses Billy to save Morning Land from eternal darkness because he's such a lazy fuck who can't save his own country. Menie-Funie forces Billy to wear a ridiculous "Legendary Chicken Suit" which gives him superpowers. For the remainder of the game, Billy has to go around saving the "Chicken Elders", which the crows have trapped inside Golden Eggs.
Characters
This game doesn't have many characters, and for good reason too, they're all obnoxious dipshits:
- Billy Hatcher: Titular character, a 12-year-old Sonic the Hedgehog fanfaggot who masturbates to chickens every day.
- Rolly Roll: Basically Amy the Hedgehog, in a chicken-suit. Annoying, hyperactive loli who shouts "Ay!" whenever she makes any fucking movement.
- Chick Poacher: Basically Miles "Tails" Prower, in a chicken-suit. He's the beta-male emo of the group, and the most likely to commit suicide before the age of 18.
- Bantam Scrambled: Basically Knuckles the Echidna, in a chicken-suit. Bantam is the token alpha-male douchebag who fucks the white wimminz every night.
Do you notice the fucking trend?
Fandom
For an obsolete video game that only sold like 100 copies or so, Billy Hatcher has a surprisingly large fandom on Tumblr. Most of the fanart is a bunch of crossovers with other SEGA titles, such as "Super Monkey Ball", "Samba de Amigo", or... ahem, "Sonic the Hedgehog". It's usually authored by autistic, retarded 13-year-olds, or lonely, obese 30-year-old basement-dwellers.
See also
External links
BALEETED BECAUSE NOBODY CARED!- Billy Hatcher on Tumblr
- Has it's own fucking Wikia, like every other obscure media in existence.
- And as with every fandom, certain niggers take their obsessions way to fucking far.
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