ED is slow: Difference between revisions

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== Quote ==
== Quote ==


{{quote|1=In closing I'll note that sometimes Encyclopedia Dramatica seems to me to go offline for long stretches. Is it a fly-by-the-seat-of-its-pants operation, where some dudes maintain the database on their personal hard-drives, getting bounced from one ISP to the next, and looking to get it back up?|2=[http://archive.is/VehwJ Triptych]}}
{{quote|1=In closing I'll note that sometimes Encyclopedia Dramatica seems to me to go offline for long stretches. Is it a fly-by-the-seat-of-its-pants operation, where some dudes maintain the database on their personal hard-drives, getting bounced from one ISP to the next, and looking to get it back up?|2={{archive|VehwJ|Triptych}}}}


==Gallery==
==Gallery==

Revision as of 19:41, 28 January 2016

HOLY SHIT, ED is Fast now

This article is not crap. You can help by not doing anything.



What ED looks like a third of the time.
ED Server HQ
Inside ED's fastest server
Server crash!

ED is slow (not to be confused with 'Ed is slow') is a naturally occurring phenomenon related to the inadequacy of current Internets technology vis-a-vis the inability to transmit vast quantities of lulz at high speeds to the masses.

Usage

Prima: "ED is slow. Is it getting DDoS'd?"
Secunda: "ED is always slow."

How does ED go down?

It is frequently assumed that ED is under a DDoS attack when these are going around, however it is frequently assumed wrong, because ED is immune to DDoS attacks and is immune to ping and tracert.

Other times you get an error like Guru Meditation or an error like the one below.

Warning: require_once(extensions/youtube.php) [function.require-once]: failed to open stream: No such file or directory in /var/www/ed/wiki/LocalSettings.php on line 243

Fatal error: require_once() [function.require]: Failed opening required 'extensions/youtube.php' (include_path='/var/www/ed/wiki:/var/www/ed/wiki/includes:/var/www/ed/wiki/languages:.:/usr/share/php:/usr/share/pear') in /var/www/ed/wiki/LocalSettings.php on line 243

However, that is not the real cause. From a purely technical standpoint, ED goes down salty.

Who to blame? There is no one to "blame", Binky you Faggy Hamster. ED runs on that legendary pile of tossed salad PHP (short for "poopy code") called Media Wiki, the same crapware that TOW uses. You could probably blame TOW inner whores Magnus Manske and Brian Vibber who wrote most of the fartery, but of course nothing will be done because they are an hero.

Quote

   
 
In closing I'll note that sometimes Encyclopedia Dramatica seems to me to go offline for long stretches. Is it a fly-by-the-seat-of-its-pants operation, where some dudes maintain the database on their personal hard-drives, getting bounced from one ISP to the next, and looking to get it back up?
 

 
 

Triptych

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ED is slow

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Taking Down ED

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CensorshipDDoSFree SpeechGet a LawyerHackingMake a PetitionNotify the FBISerious BusinessSOPAThe Græt Niggercide of Old EDWriting an article for UncyclopediaYou vs. ED

ED is slow is part of a series on Language & Communication
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