S-Malone
S-Malone is your every day original arist and deep poet. Did I mention he's a Happy Tree Friends-obsessed basement dweller on deviantART, and seemingly being divorced from reality in every way possible? S-Malone (or more commonly referred to as "Slappy", the name of his abomination furfag of a fan character) brings fantard to a level only seen in nightmares covered in horse shit. He portrays himself as a virgin Christian California Sea Lion named Slappy, who apparently has super powers.
The Madness Begins
In May of 2008, we were introduced to Slappy, a character with all the charm of an ass tumor and the thought-provoking back story of a sack premature horse balls. Autistic, fucking shaved, mutilated, burned-beyond-return horse balls, that is. Sure, fan characters of pretty much anything are the spawn of Satan himself and should be avoided at all times, but the sheer stomach-wrenching horror this blight against the human race has produced is so unbelievably bad that it falls into a category all its own.
But as if the journal wasn't already ATROCIOUS ENOUGH, the comments on the journal depicted him answering and replying to all comments in character, horrific spelling and grammar included. Yes, this idiot ACTUALLY seems to think he's a hideously-drawn, horridly-conceived anthropomorphic seal.
He is also a major ass kisser. Sucking up to Surfersasquatch10 and Charlieroxz. He constantly demands Charlieroxz to draw him requests. Once Roxz had given in and drawn the faggot a pic regreting. He constantly demands requests off of Roxz, abusing her kindness and generosity. He also takes advantage of everyone else giving out requests. Making them draw his Mary-sue character. And YES MARY-SUE. Because he doesn't deserve Gary-stu.
The Rise of Evil
As if his horrid character and god-awful back story wasn't enough, we were later introduced to Evilly, a villain only conceivable by a severely mentally challenged 4th grader.
Rest in peace, proper punctuation. You will be sorely missed...
The Epic Battle
May 31st saw the release of the simply titled comic of Brian and Slappy vs. Evilly, a comic SO revolutionary it did away entirely with the concept of text boxes, movement, dialogue, and, well, pretty much anything telling a story. But before we show you this epic groundbreaking saga, we shall give you the backdrop into this powerful emotional roller coaster. Ladies and gentlemen, we bring you...The Rise of Evil...
And now, onto the epic saga of...Brian and Slappy vs. Evilly.
Note: Any and all semblance of a (horrible) story is told entirely in the description on DA.
The Obsession Continues
Slappy is known not only to be a deluded retard living in an imaginary world within a crappy Flash cartoon nobody cares about, but he's also been shown to be a self-centered egomaniac. He regularly brags about how powerful he is (despite being nothing more than a loser with no life and a warped sense of reality), even going so far as to whore himself out in his so-called "gift-arts." But wait, what does his profile say about this?
* Current Age: Immortal * Current Residence: Cleveland, Georgia * Interests: Drawing,Swiming and fishing. * Favourite movie: Star Wars * Favourite band or musician: I don't kown. * Favourite artist: Me * Favourite style of art: Happy Tree Friends * Shell of choice: Scallop * Wallpaper of choice: White * Skin of choice: Don't care * Favourite game: I've got all kinds. * Favourite gaming platform: PlayStation 2 * Favourite cartoon character: All the HTF characters * Personal Quote: I'll seal your fate! * Tools of the Trade: My mouse and my right flipper.
Wow, that sure was modest, wasn't it? Certainly, there's no way this guy is a psychotic dweeb with an ego the size of Canada! </sarcasm>
It is believed that association with Slappy will either make you realize just what kind of fucking stupidity you've gotten yourself into and bring you to stop, or it will reveal just what a fucking inbred load of mentally-challenged pond scum you are if you continue to put up with him. Be it his ego, shitty artwork, horrendous writing, or general creepiness, by now most of his former "friends" have left him behind them, walking away a lot wiser knowing that they could follow the same fate. And yet, there's still a load of idiots who not only continue to put up with and socialize with him, but even in some cases producing fanart for him. That's right. This moron has FANART! If that doesn't make you fear for mankind's future, than nothing, and we mean nothing will.
Other Notable Gems
Slappy's monstrous ego and unwillingness to take any form of critique continues to lead him down the path of luzliness. His artwork and story-telling is still as retarded as ever, and he still refuses to undertake any sort of improvement and keeps staying to his tried-and-true method of producing high-grade dogshit.
One notable, and seemingly discontinued, project called Master of Evil, where we see for the first time the full-scale of his literary ineptitude. Though due to the intervention of a user on DA, all the errors were fixed, producing a more refined and sadly far less lulzy version ([1]) But don't be sad, because we've done the honor of preserving this abortion against literature for your viewing pleasure. The following below is the actual story in its original form. No editing, no revisions, no shit.
Slappy Presents… The master of evil (By S-Malone) Chapter 1:The master After Terra THE QUEEN OF NIGHTMARES was defeated little did the demon slayers kown a far grater threat was growing that would destroy all life. Slappy was haveing one of his visons then Brian came into the room very angry. Brian: Slappy Where the hell were you we could have used your help!? Slappy opens his eyes. Slappy:Oh no this can't be! Brian:What?Slappy:Uh nothing Brian i hope so.Brian: You hope so Slappy did you see something?Slappy:No Brian i did'nt see you and the demon lord destroying-Damn it just forget what i said!Slappy walks out the room,Weeks later.Brian:I'm telling ya Cream Slappy saw something bad but he won't tell me what he saw.Cream:Slappy has been acting weird lately.Brian:He said someing about a demon lord.Cream a demon lord whos that?Then the power gos out.Brian:What?Cream:What happened to the power?Brian:Blue!Blue:What?Brian:Is this some kinda joke!?Blue:No Brian see the swich is still on.Brian:Wait wheres Slappy?Destructo man:I bet hes responsible for this i still can't believe you let that stupid sea lion join us!Brian:I'll tell ya what i'm about to club me a seal!Destructo man:Well lets find him.Brian:split up.Brian hears Slappy voice.Brian:What Slappy are you in there?Slappy:No go away!
Crushing Fetish
Just when you thought you'd seen the worst. Just when you thought Slappy couldn't make himself look like an even bigger failure, he finds some way to outdo himself. Around July 3rd of 2009, it was revealed that Slappy has a crushing fetish. Through his artwork and comments, it was made public that he is sexually aroused by the idea of being crushed by a woman's foot. Some comments proving are as follows:
What's worse is that he actually wrote an erotic fanfiction about it, using other user's OCs without their permission and portraying them grossly out of character. Those of you willing to see natural selection disproved once and for all, please read the carefully preserved and creatively titled Shrink Seal.
Once this fiction was made public, Veriear's owner,Veridiann, was, like any sane human being, displeased with her character being used without her consent and used as OOC fetish fuel. So she demanded her character be removed or have the story taken down. Slappy complied and replaced her character with Twisted-Hope's fursona, again without permission, and evoked the same results. Only this time, when Twisted-Hope demanded THREE times to have her character removed, he ignored her. It took Veridiann's posting of a journal dedicated to bashing him in order for him to take down the story altogether, which was met with much applause and cheers from the less-retarded wing of the HTF-fanbase. After becoming yet again subject of near-universal ridicule for his sick fetish, he tried to become "tough" by trying (and failing miserably) at trolling.
Pedophile life
On the Happy Tree Friends Social Site S-malone claimed to be 'in love' and 'wanting to hit' 13 year old Charlieroxz.
This is creepy and lulzy because Malone claims to be 20 and Roxz claims to be 13 and in a relationship.
One of his SICK AS FUCK QUOTES about Charlieroxz's 'rack'-
He showed his pedo when he said he 'wanted to fuck roxz',that she has a 'nice rack', and he would hold her down and fuck her on the spot if he ever saw her. He also said she was a Sexy Norwegian Asian with a hot Filipino mother. Although he claimed that she was also a clueless hoe and a bitch. He also knows Roxz's last name and her hometown. And looks forward to when she comes to his state so he can fuck his 'Sexy Norwegian'. According to this our Pedo Senses should be tingling.
Links
The page detailing the gradual fall of this moron's sanity. (ABANDONED due to being butthurt)
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