nuchan

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nuchan
FoundationApril 5, 2013
Major BoardsLOL NO BOARDS
Epic WinsNone
Websitenuchan.org
In 2013, another *chan abomination was erected, entitled nuchan. Though this in itself is non-notable, the drama and subsequent lulz that ensued after owner puddles slowly degradated into a neo-savetheinternet were enough to bring together the entirety of ED against a confirmed faggot enemy. In typical socially isolated manchild fashion, puddles registered the #nuchan irc channel on the same network as #ed, hoping his "great pals" at Encyclopedia Dramatica would be more than happy to support his 4chon.net clone.

puddles

This person has Assburgers Syndrome,
so you can't say anything bad! :-(


Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.
Note: this is an article about an Encyclopedia Dramatica user. For more information, please see the appropriate user page. To leave this user a message, please visit their talk page.


Puddles has been known for many things over his lackluster Internet career, a failure of an image board owner (that no longer exists because he was too poor to afford basic hosting fees), a lowly IRC denizen consistently abused by most users of WTFux, and presently the only ED admin to ever pay for sysops.

When not dick riding every person capable of supplying him with even a fraction of e-power, he enjoys spending his evenings trying to have cyber sex with schizophrenic IRC girls and posting fake information about himself on Pastebin. Currently an Idaho resident, puddles briefly attended Boise State University until flunking out. This does not bother him because he works minimum wage at a sushi restaurant in a landlocked state. Puddles not content with being a complete fuck up at all of his endeavors does nothing to improve the serious social & developmental problems that have persisted his entire short miserable life. He is attended to by not one but two psychiatrists as even the professional experience of a mental health practitioner cannot prepare you for the sheer level of fucked to death shit that is puddles. His only attempted claims to relevance over the 20+ years of existence is, after one of his users managed to social an admin password from an even bigger retard than puddles, he stole all the credit for it. He frequently enjoys viewing lolicon and purchasing ghetto quality research chems to get high.

Puddles the Person

Born to a loving family of meth addicts with only the broken pipe stems on their back to shield them from the elements, puds experienced a typical Idaho upbringing, filled with physical abuse and rampant drug use. Puddles is predictably flawed as a human being, due largely to the staggering amount of trailer trash biker speed his mother consumed during her pregnancy. His father, more interested in handjobs and crank, left young piddles to his own devices. Little improved for him over the course of 16 years, and he proved to be such an embarrassment that the people that could stand his presence for more than an hour used the opportunity to subject the mentally disabled manchild to various forms of hilarious adolescent torture. It was apparently so severe that even noted chat veteran bonzi_b was amazed at the sheer beta ass prat submission he regularly put up with.

   
 
<bonzi_b> well i mean he is a child of a completely fucking broken family lol

<bonzi_b> and like one of his best irl friends <bonzi_b> literally left him in a snow bank to catch hypothermia
<bonzi_b> and get arrested

 


 
 

—ED IRC

Mental Health

If pushed hard enough, puddles behavior will become increasingly erratic until he erupts into a complete manic frenzy, flailing at anything he perceives as his enemy. He will then accuse everyone present of being either autistic, gay, or a thirteen year old. Should this defense mechanism be ineffective in protecting his frail ego he will endlessly spout about his delusions, particularly, of grandeur. Insisting he is above everyone else and in fact the entire Internet itself, he will refuse to listen to anything, except of course his own calming self delusions. Should someone question him as to what basis he has for believing this severely fractured madness, he will quit or leave immediately, threaten to ignore people (only to never follow through), or begin babbling incoherently to himself. He has even been seen talking to himself for several hours alone in his own chatrooms.

Unlike common suffers of ALR, or Absolute Life Ruin, puddles' fantasy world is the Internet itself. On it, he is a well respected member of a notorious organization, when in reality he is a drain on vital societal resources. He is completely dependent on what strangers online think of him and craves their validation more than anything else. Not surprisingly, being rejected usually is enough to send him back into blind rage.

Puddles is a pre-psychotic schizophrenic who must visit with two psychologists to ensure he doesn't completely break with reality.

nuchan, The chan that never was

puddles began his online career, like many mentally deficient assclowns, as a dedicated frequenter of 4chan. Believing this benchmark of pure unfunny garbage wasn't shitty enough for his refined tastes he was slowly kicked down the ladder before ending up in #RaspberryHeaven and #animu. During his slow descent downward into the depths of plebery he became associated with a site called NewChan. Never heard of NewChan? Shocking. Nevertheless, through sheer will and unimaginable effort puddles soon became a moderator for the site so that instead of spending most of his time fucking around he could finally waste all of it. And do it for Free!

Rise to E-Fame

Soon though pud pud became restless and decided to steal everything from NewChan except the domain name itself. He copied the shitty web software barely powering fucking nothing and claimed it as his freeware. Soon he bought up some bargain brand webspace and hastily christened his precious ripoff NUCHAN. GET IT? CAUSE IT'S NEW. Unfortunately, however, much like nu-metal and nu-rap the site was an abortion of terrible ideas unfit to live.

Things started seemingly well for puddles at his new imageboard no-one had ever heard about. Convinced that they should follow a new fuckup rather than the old one many of NewChan's users migrated over. To keep up he appointed a few mods or eight to police this massive influx of new users numbering in the one's to ten's worth. Before you knew it nuchan was a regular circle jerk of a community. Deciding nothing further was needed he could finally live it up as a real life Chan Owner. To his dismay nobody else showed up in the following days and weeks.

   
 
You tried to promote it a few weeks ago and you just got shot-down because you're retarded and you also ban anyone who disagrees with you or you don't like. Faggot of the top calibre.
 

 
 

Anon on Nuchan

So puds did the only thing that came naturally to him. He begged on other imageboards for people to visit his wasteland and when that failed proceeded to be an insufferable faggot until someone banned him. Fully humiliated and rejected he would then move onto another site and then to the next, and so forth. Finally after assembling a trusted circle of cocksuckers and enough 13 year olds to lord over he took a break from being mercilessly raped to devise his next strategy. Realizing he was a useless mongoloid shut-in useless to anyone of worth he set his sights on being the king of the retard pile. During his travels as a detested piss stain on the Internet he managed to encounter similar outcasts with a yearn to care about the Internet. Together they learned through extensive use of buzzwords and unrelated technical terms they could emit a stream of thought vomit convincing enough to fool gullible chantrash. Problematically, however, was the small detail that they were incapable of hacking anything and could barely run prepackaged web software.

Puddles the Hacker

Leakage of puddles' ddos number after his manual spamming of 888chan

Fortunately a middle age man pretending to be a girl named Molly happened to be one of puddles' most trusted colleagues. What he lacked in skill he made up for in knowing people even more pathetic than himself. Lucky for Molly conning retards is about the easiest task to accomplish and managed to gain the confidence of two mouthbreathing chan admins. Falsely believing they were giving their passwords and site privileges out to a hot girl on the Internet they willingly complied. The kiddie skid camp then took each offline and claimed victory over two websites with even less users than their own that no one ever visited. Puddles was sure to let everyone who would listen that it was the work of nuchan and in particular its feared black hat hacker leader. In reality he sucked up to a middle aged old man for passwords and then tried to claim it was a hack. Later he found out that Golly was indeed a man and EPICALLY trolled him by letting him stick around.

808chan

Following his triumphant victory puddles felt like nuchan was really succeeding and that again it was time to turn it up a notch and go after a bigger target, 808chan. This hilariously backfired as 808chan was not populated by 4 people and its IRC server was being used to host GNAA channels. Believing there to be no way to discern his identity he and his band of merry turboqueers attempted to slowly flood the board with advertisements for nuchan. Achieving nothing but angering the owner resulted in his site being crapflooded out of existence, then being DDOS'd off the Internet entirely, and revealed his IP in a short span afterward. He then proceeded to flip the fuck out.

Puddles vs 808chan

   
 
Yeah, you can go fuck yourself.
 

 
 

—puddles' only phrase

puddles began his career by soliciting for posters on the already established 888chan, site owner NekoArc was less than amused. Thus leading to the initial spam and ddos attacks against the site. Concerned posters then took their queries to #nuchan.

(6:11:41 PM) NekoArc [[email protected]] entered the room.
(6:11:42 PM) selddup: could it have been anyone else?
(6:11:44 PM) Meepsheep [[email protected]] entered the room.
(6:11:45 PM) Zalgo: [Meepsheep] http://www.anonmgur.com/up/2bc0e963f089b5c9218f7b9032708202.jpg
(6:11:51 PM) selddup: shit
(6:12:04 PM) selddup: PUDDLES, the gay niggers are back
(6:12:12 PM) Meepsheep: hello faggots
(6:12:15 PM) NekoArc: ooh look the two users that hopped onto my netwwork
(6:12:21 PM) NekoArc: are in here
(6:12:27 PM) puddles: where?
(6:12:30 PM) kbum: lol dingus
(6:12:31 PM) puddles: oh
(6:12:33 PM) puddles: Sup meep
(6:12:37 PM) selddup: those 2 are the spammers
(6:12:43 PM) selddup: :|
(6:12:52 PM) selddup: :|:|:|:|:|:
(6:12:52 PM) NekoArc: you guys 
(6:12:54 PM) NekoArc: are giving me delicious logs
(6:13:01 PM) NekoArc: for this delicious drama
(6:13:06 PM) selddup: i know you like to eat shit
(6:13:08 PM) ***NekoArc hands selddup a shovel
(6:13:11 PM) puddles: Neko you do realize you're creating the drama... right?
(6:13:11 PM) selddup: but saying you like logs?
(6:13:16 PM) fl0ss [[email protected]] entered the room.
(6:13:16 PM) Zalgo: [fl0ss] <asshurtmacfags> ACTION bites finger
(6:13:25 PM) NekoArc: 02:14:23 < selddup> shit
(6:13:25 PM) NekoArc: 02:14:36 < selddup> PUDDLES, the gay niggers are back
(6:13:31 PM) NekoArc: lol
(6:13:35 PM) puddles: yeah the GNAA
(6:13:39 PM) selddup: just ban now pls
(6:13:40 PM) puddles: what about them?
(6:13:40 PM) NekoArc: right as i enter
(6:13:41 PM) NekoArc: so
(6:13:45 PM) selddup: get it over with
(6:13:48 PM) NekoArc: you're the ones creatingg drama
(6:13:56 PM) NekoArc: by originally hopping onto my irc network
(6:14:01 PM) NekoArc: and not understanding what zalgo is
(6:14:08 PM) puddles: Nothing was stopping you from kickbanning them
(6:14:11 PM) fl0ss: Yes, hello.
(6:14:14 PM) puddles: You're just a dumb cunt who feeds off drama
(6:14:14 PM) ry|an [[email protected]] entered the room.
(6:14:17 PM) Meepsheep: hello fl0ss
(6:14:18 PM) NekoArc: have you realized
(6:14:21 PM) Meepsheep: hello ry|an
(6:14:22 PM) NekoArc: that we mess with idiots?
(6:14:23 PM) ry|an: hello friends
(6:14:26 PM) fl0ss: Meepsheep: what's going on here?
(6:14:29 PM) selddup: F̴̛̥͑Ü̝͍̗̣͇̱̳̗͂̿̎̌ͬ̆̀̀́̕Č̱͚̠̪̦͉͌ͧK̢̬͓̿ͦ̐͂̾͛̿̈ ͦ̈́̈́̍̄̔̉̄҉̴̳̜͡Y͂͌͋ͫ̇͢͠͏̖̞O̫̜͐ͣ͑͌͆̾ͣ͘Ȕ̷̢̯̹̳͇̯̙͕̞ͯͥͯ ̴͇͖̜̭̘͇̤͆̔̂ͮͦͨ̽͠I̷̧̙̰̤͈͈̿̎̉̽̇̈́ ̲̲̖̤̻̼͙ͣ̾̓͡ͅK̽͋ͯ҉̣̖̬N̩͉̺̺͕̰͂́ͥ͊O̺̼̥̪̫̳̬͂͌ͦ̇ͯW̸̰̝͎ͥ̒̃ͧ͡ ͖͎̼̲̗̲ͫ̏Zͤ͒̾̏̂̚͟҉̸͔̲̣͖̲̯̭À̰͈͖̬̭̠̠̗ͩ̍̈́̔͂L̓́̈̍̑̄͏?
(6:14:31 PM) Meepsheep: fl0ss, we got a live one
(6:14:37 PM) ry|an: a burn
(6:14:40 PM) ry|an: a big burn
(6:14:43 PM) ry|an: lets get on phone
(6:14:44 PM) ry|an: and
(6:14:46 PM) ry|an: send a swat team
(6:14:49 PM) ry|an: to resuce the poor server
(6:14:59 PM) LuckyKudare: Le 4chan army is here?
(6:15:05 PM) selddup: puddles, don't let them fap to this memory. end it now
(6:15:11 PM) NekoArc: le partyvan is here
(6:15:47 PM) fl0ss: Hello, everyone. I'm the GNAA's new spokesman and PR guy.
(6:15:47 PM) ry|an: rescue even
(6:15:59 PM) ry|an: hello I'm having
(6:16:00 PM) ry|an: some issues
(6:16:02 PM) fl0ss: I'd just like to get a comment from you about yesterday's redecoration of your chan.
(6:16:04 PM) ry|an: loading your website
(6:16:06 PM) ry|an: puddles
(6:16:09 PM) fl0ss: Do you think the GNAA logos brightened up the place?
(6:16:10 PM) ry|an: please fix
(6:16:11 PM) ry|an: thank you
(6:16:29 PM) Meepsheep: puddles ur site isnt loading
(6:16:37 PM) Meepsheep: how else will i get my softchats
(6:16:41 PM) ry|an: i were going to post
(6:16:42 PM) ry|an: on nuchan
(6:16:42 PM) puddles: that wouldn't be the first time meep
(6:16:43 PM) ry|an: but then it was down
(6:16:49 PM) ry|an: wtf will I do with my life now puddles 
(6:16:54 PM) ry|an: WHAT WILL I DO WITH MY LIFE NOW?
(6:17:00 PM) Meepsheep: i think im going into shock
(6:17:07 PM) ry|an: same
(6:17:20 PM) Meepsheep: i literally just punched a baby
(6:17:23 PM) Meepsheep: thats how upset i am
(6:17:31 PM) puddles: did you punch a wall?
(6:17:35 PM) puddles: not because the hops suck
(6:17:40 PM) puddles: but because of the disrespect
(6:17:41 PM) fl0ss: NO HE PUNCHED A BABY
(6:18:04 PM) kbum: wait
(6:18:11 PM) kbum: so what did he punch?
(6:18:11 PM) NekoArc: ur users were disrespectful
(6:18:15 PM) NekoArc: and ur can't control em
(6:18:22 PM) puddles: ur cant control em
(6:18:23 PM) puddles: ur cant
(6:18:27 PM) fl0ss: kbum: He punched a baby into a wall.
(6:18:32 PM) NekoArc: :>
(6:18:33 PM) fl0ss: a white baby, of course
(6:18:39 PM) puddles: Neko here's the thing
(6:18:41 PM) puddles: None of that matters
(6:18:47 PM) puddles: This isn't about whether or not I can control them
(6:18:54 PM) puddles: It's that I choose not to
(6:18:57 PM) ry|an: puddles: 
(6:19:00 PM) NekoArc: o
(6:19:01 PM) NekoArc: then
(6:19:03 PM) ry|an: I will let your site back up after you post a picture
(6:19:04 PM) NekoArc: i have no control
(6:19:05 PM) ry|an: of your face
(6:19:06 PM) NekoArc: of what happens
(6:19:11 PM) NekoArc: to whatever someone does
(6:19:11 PM) ry|an: with a dick drawn on your right cheek
(6:19:12 PM) NekoArc: to your site
(6:19:13 PM) puddles: My face?
(6:19:16 PM) ry|an: and ryan owns me written on your forehead
(6:19:17 PM) ry|an: indeed
(6:19:19 PM) puddles: You don't even have my dox
(6:19:26 PM) ry|an: DOES THAT FUCKING MATTER?
(6:19:32 PM) puddles: OH GOD DAMMIT
(6:19:36 PM) ry|an: how is that relevant you little illiterate fuck
(6:19:40 PM) puddles: IM CALLING 911 AND IM BACKTRACING UR IP
(6:19:43 PM) puddles: FUCK YOU
(6:19:48 PM) NekoArc: xD
(6:19:57 PM) NekoArc: so edgey
(6:20:03 PM) fl0ss: why so soft
(6:20:05 PM) NekoArc: and so fast
(6:20:07 PM) NekoArc: like kotaku
(6:20:09 PM) fl0ss: only m3n r soft
(6:20:13 PM) ry|an: I'm on the phone with lulznet administration right now
(6:20:14 PM) puddles: I can type 11 words per minute
(6:20:17 PM) puddles: I'm like a jackrabbit
(6:20:19 PM) ry|an: they are about to hand over your information
(6:21:04 PM) fl0ss: well, this has been a great evening.
(6:21:10 PM) fl0ss: i was about to read war and peace
(6:21:34 PM) fl0ss: but for some reason i'm sat here in irc watching a guy called "puddles" go for the soft chatting championship of the world
(6:21:42 PM) puddles: did I win?
(6:22:04 PM) ry|an: hey puddles 
(6:22:05 PM) kbum: what exactly do you mean by
(6:22:06 PM) ry|an: why is your
(6:22:06 PM) ry|an: site down
(6:22:07 PM) ry|an: I thought it was
(6:22:07 PM) kbum: "soft chatting"
(6:22:09 PM) ry|an: protected by
(6:22:11 PM) ry|an: cloudflare
(6:22:14 PM) ry|an: bulletproof hosting
(6:22:16 PM) kbum: like talking with a flacid penis?
(6:22:26 PM) NekoArc: oh goodness
(6:22:27 PM) NekoArc: another live one
(6:22:32 PM) NekoArc: bbl :3
(6:23:00 PM) ry|an: why the fuck
(6:23:02 PM) ry|an: is my favourite site down
(6:23:06 PM) ry|an: fix this you fucking piece of shit
(6:23:16 PM) puddles: Implying I have the jew golds for cloudflare
(6:23:34 PM) ry|an: LOOKS LIKE YOU DONT
(6:23:36 PM) fl0ss: kbum: you've never engaged in any hard chats have you?
(6:23:43 PM) fl0ss: otherwise you'd know.
(6:23:52 PM) puddles: fl0ss ball so hard
(6:23:55 PM) fl0ss: when you know...you just know, you know?
(6:23:56 PM) puddles: fl0ss confirmed nigger
(6:24:01 PM) kbum: sounds like something a faggot would do
(6:24:17 PM) puddles: Or worse
(6:24:22 PM) puddles: Something a nancy would do
(6:24:23 PM) zodiac: these guys sound like 11 yr old 4chinner im laughing so hard at this
(6:24:45 PM) fl0ss: i've never understood why someone would call someone in the "gay nigger association of america" a faggot
(6:24:49 PM) fl0ss: p self defeating if you ask me
(6:25:03 PM) puddles: Zodiac they all just "joined" the GNAA and now they feel like they're comedic internet badasses
(6:25:11 PM) puddles: You've been in for how long?
(6:25:12 PM) puddles: a month?
(6:25:18 PM) fl0ss: "just joined"
(6:25:22 PM) fl0ss: did meepsheep just join?
(6:25:29 PM) puddles: I wasn't talking about meep
(6:25:36 PM) fl0ss: "they all"
(6:25:42 PM) fl0ss: you might want to structure your sentences better.
(6:25:54 PM) puddles: You're dodging the question. But that's cool dude
(6:26:15 PM) kbum: so you guys are in th gay nigger association of america
(6:26:26 PM) fl0ss: lol, because it matters how long i've been in the GNAA
(6:26:30 PM) puddles: they're the GRIDS killing the GNAA kbum
(6:26:41 PM) puddles: And subsequently killing the internet
(6:26:52 PM) fl0ss: lll
(6:26:56 PM) selddup: muh internet
(6:27:08 PM) puddles: weev is turning over in his cell, weeping at you softchatters. You're destroying everything he created
(6:27:26 PM) fl0ss: I very much doubt that's what he's weeping over.
(6:30:32 PM) kbum: so you guys all join a group and run around and try to piss people off?
(6:31:00 PM) puddles: Originally that was the intent of the GNAA
(6:32:02 PM) kbum: they should go after scientologists or something
(6:32:28 PM) Meepsheep: (00:32)  @kbum: they should go after scientologists or something
(6:32:35 PM) Meepsheep: le legion
(6:32:50 PM) puddles: Honestly meep that's what the GNAA has been acting like lately
(6:32:58 PM) puddles: That's the joke
(6:33:09 PM) puddles: Everything has been crumbling
(6:33:42 PM) ry|an: SO HAS YOUR CHANBOARD
(6:34:13 PM) fl0ss: I'd listen to him Meepsheep, he's been cited by the History channel as a scholar in GNAA History & Ideology
(6:34:37 PM) puddles: floss are you still upset because I called you out on your bullshit that you're brand fucking new?
(6:35:06 PM) puddles: Your emotions are clouding your trolling abilities, for one. that's how I can tell
(6:35:07 PM) fl0ss: No, because that doesn't matter in the slightest.
(6:35:18 PM) fl0ss: hahahaha
(6:35:38 PM) fl0ss: Am I on the set of the new Star Wars film?
(6:35:51 PM) ry|an: yes
(6:35:51 PM) ry|an: you are
(6:35:54 PM) ry|an: and puddles
(6:35:57 PM) ry|an: is that fucking furry thing
(6:36:07 PM) ry|an: running around yelling
(6:36:10 PM) puddles: I've never seen Star Wars
(6:36:20 PM) kbum: chewbaka?
(6:36:44 PM) kbum: ugh. I'm so hungry but all i have is toquitos
(6:37:36 PM) puddles: I just had some Trix
(6:37:42 PM) puddles: Holy shit dude. I could just eat it all day

Round 2

Round 3

puddles then, being the paranoid fuck he is, instantly kickbanned NekoArc on sight the moment she joined the nuchan IRC. His collapsing mental state was clearly depicted upon NekoArc's request for an explanation.

02:44:42 -!- Irssi: Starting query in wtfux with puddles
02:44:49 <NekoArc> what was with the rude kickban?
02:45:26 <puddles> how are you associated with 888chan
02:46:00 <puddles> because the admin decided to be edgy enough to post the IP addresses of some of my nuchanners
02:46:29 <NekoArc> i asked a question first
02:46:36 <puddles> because the admin decided to be edgy enough to post the IP addresses of some of my nuchanners
02:46:39 <puddles> I just answered it
02:46:43 <puddles> I just answered it
02:46:45 <puddles> because the admin decided to be edgy enough to post the IP addresses of some of my nuchanners
02:47:00 <NekoArc> what does that have to do with anything? :o
02:47:07 <puddles> you're associated with 888chan
02:47:14 <puddles> now I'd like to know how deeply
02:47:42 <NekoArc> how deeply what?
02:47:56 <puddles> how deeply you're associated with 888chan
02:48:17 <NekoArc> why is that such a concern for you?
02:48:51 <puddles> 18:44 <NekoArc> what was with the rude kickban?
02:48:56 <puddles> 18:46 <NekoArc> i asked a question first
02:49:03 <puddles> Try following your own words
02:49:14 <puddles> I asked a question first
02:49:29 <NekoArc> I post there
02:50:25 <puddles> thats it?
02:50:32 <NekoArc> yus
02:50:41 <puddles> You're not part of the "staff?"
02:50:49 <puddles> Also they have your IRC linked on the front page
02:51:28 <NekoArc> and your point?
02:52:15 <puddles> 888chan is my enemy since they decided it was wise to post the IP addresses of my nuchanners. Granted, IP addresses mean nothing these days. Regardless
02:52:20 <puddles> A friend of my enemy is my enemy
02:52:28 <puddles> So pick one. them or us
02:53:31 <NekoArc> hmm
02:53:46 <NekoArc> why not turn the tables on them?
02:54:32 <puddles> because I have no interest in doing so
02:54:40 <puddles> they're a waste of time
02:54:53 <NekoArc> then why are they an enemy?
02:55:29 <puddles> because they spat in our faces
02:55:47 <NekoArc> how so?
02:56:00 <puddles> I've already told you four times
02:56:04 <NekoArc> well
02:56:07 <NekoArc> say it one more time
02:56:14 <puddles> probably not
02:56:17 <NekoArc> and i won't ask again regarding that
03:00:04 <NekoArc> then there is no need to be upset and ban me over what someone else did
22:01:13 -!- puddles is now known as SimpIex
22:05:39 -!- SimpIex is now known as splashypuddles
23:50:04 <NekoArc> I just got linked this and lol'd. guess you want people to spam? http://nuchan.org/misc/res/100
23:50:54 <splashypuddles> I guess
23:51:02 <splashypuddles> why are you asking me?
23:51:08 <splashypuddles> my community has a mind of its own
Day changed to 06 May 2013
00:03:08 <NekoArc> that's all I needed to know
00:36:30 <splashypuddles> Are you ddosing nuchan?
00:36:52 <NekoArc> no
00:39:29 <NekoArc> why would you bother me and ask that?
00:40:48 <NekoArc> maybe your community actually pissed someone else off
00:40:52 <splashypuddles> Dont ask such a dumb question
00:40:57 <splashypuddles> And stop acting like a victim
00:41:25 -!- splashypuddles is now known as puddles
00:41:27 <NekoArc> I'm not acting like a victim :o
00:42:28 <NekoArc> you seem to be fustrated at me for no apparent reason
00:43:03 <puddles> Im not frusterated at all
00:43:10 <puddles> I'm just exhausted at you always being so poisonous
00:43:27 <puddles> everything you say is always heavy with deceit
00:45:33 <NekoArc> actually it isn't
00:45:50 <NekoArc> you come off a bit paranoid though
00:58:31 -!- puddles [[email protected]] has quit [NickServ (GHOST command used by puddless)]
Day changed to 07 May 2013
11:26:58 -!- puddles is now known as not_puddles
11:27:44 -!- not_puddles is now known as puddles
Day changed to 08 May 2013
Day changed to 09 May 2013
Day changed to 10 May 2013
Day changed to 11 May 2013
Day changed to 12 May 2013
20:13:32 <NekoArc> wtf bro
20:14:15 <NekoArc> what was with the ban?
20:18:41 <NekoArc> puddles wtf why are you being emo?
20:18:54 <puddles> im an emu
20:19:12 <NekoArc> o so you're a furry
20:20:26 <puddles> my fursona is an emu with a cigarette and a biker's helmet
20:21:30 <NekoArc> o ok
20:21:36 <NekoArc> i see ur getting spammed lol
20:31:21 <NekoArc> so how is idaho anyways?
20:31:58 <puddles> not bad
20:32:01 <puddles> It's pretty hot
20:34:19 <NekoArc> huh
20:34:26 <NekoArc> apparently you got found out as one of the spammers
20:34:27 <NekoArc> rip
20:35:19 <puddles> lol what?
20:42:59 <NekoArc> nice playing innocent adn trying to play off that i'm spamming
20:43:05 <NekoArc> pretty funny
20:43:10 <NekoArc> cept i'm not  spamming
20:43:10 <NekoArc> :D
20:43:25 <puddles> I dont even know what you're talking about


Saving Private Dramatica

puddles aka Flowjob aka Wyatt Arent
   
 
<puddles> oh Frost I'm also an editor on ED now

<puddles> We all get along
<puddles> I sorta helped bring ED back
<puddles> from the shithouse it had become
<puddles> so its cool now

 


 
 

—puddles saved ED singlehandedly

Needing a place to lie low and reconstruct his fallen empire of elite hacker capabilities puddles decided to try his hand at Encyclopedia Dramatica. Despite no one inviting him to the party he would regularly claim to be the saviour of ED and the sole reason for its continued existence. His actual contributions tallied up to a few pages about memes from nuchan no one knew anything about or care to and a shitty attack article about a math nerd. Most of his contributions were related to the production of the nuchan article before his shameless self promotion was hijacked and driven into the ground. Finding little progress being a wiki monkey and seeing the fabulous benefits of spreading the word of nuchan to ED IRC. He quickly connected and registered the channel #nuchan excited to open the floodgates of EDitors anxious to utilize his candy ass shitcreation. ED IRC responded very unkindly and in the end he only managed to pick up 2 users.

puddles vs phobos

Continuing his lucrative pursuit in trying to involve himself in anything capable of forcing others to acknowledge him and his backwater imagechan populated by 10 users; puddles decided he needed to start shit with #ed's chat elite. While initially believing himself immune from retribution he quickly pissed the bed after logs were recovered of him being a lowest tier fuckup contemplating avoiding college in Idaho in favor of trying to grow brickweed with one of his chanpals. He spends his many hours coordinating couches he can visit if his 1.6 GPA manages to dip below 1 and self promoting a site with an Alexa number in the trillions. After being outed as a shame on humanity, disgrace to his family, and talented dropout his imagechan was unceremoniously meh'd and filled with far better content.

   
 
<puddles> also

<puddles> I kinda with I was gay some times
<puddles> looking at that shit
<puddles> Because think about it

 


 
 

—puddles wishing he were gay so he could suck dicks

   
 
<puddles> I already told cheese I'd join him

<puddles> if this school thing doesn't work
 


 
 

—puddles discussing his plans to drop out of college and surf couches

   
 
<~puddles> The Truth is an idea that came from fullmetal alchemist DUH

<~puddles> any weaboo knows that
 


 
 

—puddles proudly proclaims his weeb status

Those crazy kids will never learn will they?

See also

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