Marshall and Millions
Note: This article is about two violent pitbulls, it should not be confused with the candy M&Ms, which are ironically something that should have been fed to these fucking dogs.
Marshall and Millions were two Bri'ish shitbulls who were shot to death by the Bri'ish police on May 7, 2023 after attacking a woman's dog and acting aggressive towards officers. Marshall and Millions were owned by a Bri'ish hobo named Louie Turnbull (moar lyk Louie Turnsdangerouspitbullslooseontheunsuspectingpublic amirite?) who was banned from owning dogs due to previous instances of him owning bloodthirsty fighting beasts that craved the soft, moist flesh of children. It's also worth noting that Turnbull fled from police and left Marshall and Millions unrestrained immediately prior to the shooting, thus showing what a competent and loyal pet owner he was.
Much like the Fentanyl-induced death of African Americunt pornstar and career criminal George "Big Floyd" Floyd, the death of Marshall and Millions quickly became a rallying cry for fat, unattractive, 30-year-old white women on Facebook who refer to their mangy pets as "furbabies" and have lost all hope of ever having an actual family of their own. Many of these dumbass bitches, who are generally referred to as "pitmommies" or "my ex-girlfriend", held the belief that Marshall and Millions dindu nuffin and that all dogs are created equal despite 13% of the dog population committing at least 50% of all dog crime.
The autism produced by the Cult of the Dead Dogs has included a change.org petition with over a millions signatures, candlelight vigils, bad poetry, horrible fanart from DevianTART users and commemorative tattoos. Yes, people have actually altered their fucking bodies to show how much they care about two dead pitbulls.
—Marshall's last barks | ||
