Tom Anderson
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This person's lack of butt ugly and alleged abundance of controversial pics demands pic gallery nao. |
Tom Anderson is the creator of MySpace. MySpace is Tom's pathetic ploy to gain e-celebrity status and the accompanying azn pu55y - Tom is the biggest friend whore on MySpace - all new MySpace users are added to Tom's friends list by default, making him appear uber-popular. Tom admitted in private conversation that this was to make it appear that MySpace has a networking system similar to Friendster's. Obviously MySpace users are too stupid to notice that every single profile they've seen "is in your extended network".
Tom has a 
sekrit profile dedicated to friending 4'10" oriental camwhores, his fetish. His profile pics are of him hanging out with azn models, porn stars and drag queens from the Los Angeles area. Unsurprisingly, they all seem to be shot in dark parking lots.
Tom got 580 million bucks for selling MySpace to Rupert Murdoch, but he's still the saddest dot-commer ever. Not only does he have to fly in unsuspecting ass to get laid, but he'll only pay half the airfare.
The early years
Tom went to Havatampon High School and excelled in faggotry, well taught by Prof. Dave Adams ([email protected]). The highlight of Tom's high school years was the proud day he was voted prom queen. Tom went batshit insane and began writing children novels about gay sex and public fapping. He wrote a book about how to rape children with over 9000 penises. But what Tom was mostly known for was his love for feces. He would spend hours eating feces, smelling feces, and the most horrible of all public fapping while holding a picture of Rosie O'Donnell. Tom would also tell his parents one day he would make a great website for people with no life, unfortunately he failed. Tom moved out and took on female stripping as his job making under minimum wage because the owner believed he was a 9 year old asian girl.
Follow the camwhore pic road
After being voted prom queen, Tom experienced brief notoriety amongst the fag hag population of his largely azn high school. This nourished Tom's stunted and bruised ego and set the stage for the dark psychology which spawned a handful of porn sites and, worse yet, MySpace itself.
Quickly abandoned by his cadre of fag hags, Tom felt betrayed and craved attention, preferably in the form of teacup azn girls which even he could stand a chance at intimidating. Chasing his dream, Tom joined a dot com company and used their equipment to develop TeamAsian.com while on the clock. After he was fired, he devoted himself full time to producing skeezy azn pr0n.
Tom soon found that Chinese hookers were wise to his tricks and could not be controlled. Also, they were old and worldly. Not fresh. Not clean. Not unspoiled save for the playful cynicism of a young teen. Tom needed younger, unsuspecting pussy without track marks. He put TeamAsian.com up for sale for $360,000 and developed MySpace.
Shangri-la
MySpace succeeded beyond Tom's wildest dreams. Assured a thousand lifetimes of self-indulgent camwhore pics, an unending flood of underage vaginae and eternal e-popularity by his cunning "ALL users are friends of Tom" scheme, Tom embarked upon a rampage of yellow cherry plundering, stopping only to delete the profiles of unsatisfied victims who complained publicly about his small cock.
Then Rupert Murdoch bought MySpace for $580 million.
This alone proves there is no justice in the universe. If we examine Tom's story critically, we must come to the conclusion that suicide is the only option for one and all.
The anti-Tom movement
Tom's faggotry and excessive censorship on MySpace has led to a whole genre of anti-MySpace sites where members of this emerging subculture meet to share artwork, music and sentiments about how gay Tom is.
Tom doesn't use myspace anymore.
External links
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Tom Anderson is part of a series on Visit the Social Media Portal for complete coverage. |
| Featured article February 17, 2006 | ||
| Preceded by Wapanese |
Tom Anderson | Succeeded by Fourth Wall |
| Featured article July 14, 2006 | ||
| Preceded by The Great Habbo Raid of July 2006 |
Tom Anderson | Succeeded by MONGO |
