Ryan Gentle

This article needs a serious clean up

Ryan Gentle (Senshimedia)

NOTE: CURRENTLY REBUILDING IN LIGHT OF HIS RECENT CONVICTION FOR SEXUAL ASSAULT AND HIS DEALINGS WITH DOGECOIN

This article is about Ryan ~~Gentle~~ ~~Albright~~ ~~Dawson~~ ~~Fletcher~~ Kennedy, who is a real ~~person~~ liar with real ~~feelings~~ scammings who may sue you for libel if he thinks you might write something true about him. If you ever have the misfortune to cross paths with him, we beg of you...

do NOT believe a single word he says and for fuck's sake, NEVER GIVE HIM MONEY.

Ryan Gentle is an uncontrollable fantastist, compulsive liar, amateur scammer, part-time web designer, and full-time helmet. He has been providing a consistently high quality of drama< inside the UK anime fan scene for many years now and more recently with bitcoin and dogecoin. His unbearable desire to "Be Somebody" in the community and prey on girls in the same instance, causing as much mayhem as mirth, and is well worth learning more about.

When not stealing as much money as possible from his "friends", his trademark manoeuvre is to promise discount flights to Japan, supply free computers and webspace, and private conventions including the supposed booking of London's Hyde Park for an outdoor anime showing to the younger (and slightly thicker) otaku on anime forums. When there are suggestions of foul play from more learned posters, Ryan is often backed up by kids who are easily deceived by his offers of free Pocky, paid LiveJournal accounts, or perhaps an intoxicated fumbling rape in a tent.

Sightings of Ryan can be difficult to authenticate due to multiple aliases and profile information, but common elements are a location in either Plymouth, Liverpool, Birmingham or Tokyo, an occupation in sys-admin or web design, hobbies in the martial arts, and a birth date of December 17th 1986. In addition he continues to demonstrate he has no fucking idea that 'must of' and 'would/could/should of', and 'your' instead of 'you are/you're', are only used by completely illiterate fucking retards who don't understand that 'of' is fucking not a fucking verb and 'your' fucking indicates something fucking belonging to the second fucking person, you fucking FUCK!

Lying Mental

Here follows a compilation of factoids rescued from the archives of an arcane and elusive social group called 'HashC' (commonly considered to be /Elitist" title="Elitist">elitist, highly influential, and quite simply just better than you are):

DISCLAIMER: As we are currently living in perpetual fear of a very expensive lawlsuit being filed by Ryan and his company, we would like to point out that most if not all of the information written below is of a fabricated nature - in that it was entirely fabricated by Ryan himself, obviously. Most are things Ryan has lied about personally and very publicly; some are things we've heard from others, and therefore are only second hand comedy. However we guarantee all of this is very funny!

He is changing his name to Kousuke Ichikawa ("The First River"). Ryan's feeble brain has just glued two Japanese words together - ichi 一 (one) and kawa 川 (river); when typed in through the Windows Japanese IME, using bias for names, 'ichikawa' comes out as 市川 - meaning 'market river'.
His first name comes from his murderous father and his middle name comes from his fucked up granddad, hence the perceived need for a name change. Of course, this never happened - and people who know the family assert that his father, er, never killed anyone anyway. Oh, and his father's name is actually Kevin.
He was Company Director of ZefieNET (incorporated for eight weeks), but decided to fold the business after eight weeks due to it being too much stress to cope with at his tender age.
Despite only existing for eight weeks, ZefieNET was a global success - it had "lots of international business clients" and between them, his clients were using an entirely unlikely 70MBit of VoIP traffic.
He is a martial arts instructor, and was a member of a /Chav" title="Chav">street gang in Japan... Sadly, however, he was the only survivor of this gang after the rest were wiped out in a battle with the Yakuza. (Yes, he actually told people this.)
His business success isn't surprising, when you consider his glorious past! He received a quarter of a million pounds when he was 16 for a programming contract, and since then has been offered a job by Google, and has shares in Google, Microsoft and Yahoo. (Despite this, he is commonly to be found begging for money for train fares from gullible children.)
Despite his previous life in the Land of the Rising Sun fighting off the Yakuza, he claims to have spent "ten years" getting a visa to move to Japan - but gave it up to run the now postponed KyuuCon. On further questioning he implied that he actually meant that it was a 10-year visa (although they, um, don't exist).
He is bisexual, has an eight inch penis and can ejaculate eight times in a single hot, sweaty sex session
He is friends with the Beat Crusaders, and has a close relationship with the Otakon committee, who he planned to /Scam" title="Scam">enlist to help /Pwn" title="Pwn">crush AyaCon 2003 and AmeCon 2004 after they told him to GTFO.
In spite of his global business experience, he tried to get people to pay for a convention by sending him personal cheques made out to his name. His plan was to move these to a business account later - which, sadly, constitutes money laundering and fraud. Oops.
He wanted to be auctioned off at AyaCon 2005 (!!!)

Ryan has apparently been offered a job in Scotland as a "lead developer", earning ￡43,000 per annum, but turned it down due to not wanting to move.
Text answering service AQA thinks he is very special as he is the only "Ryan Gentle" in the UK. Shame he's changed his name then.
Also: "AQA thinks Ryan is an idiot, but a loveable one. AQA can't help but see his nature and optimism as a pleasant side to his character." Hmm. Looks like he's hacked them as well.
He was chief developer of <a href="http://ukcosplay.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">UKCosplay.com. "UKCosplay.com is powered by zefieCMS, a PHP/SQL content management system developed by Kousuke (Ryan), the Lead Administrator for this site." Evidence indicates site was running Mambo CMS.
Later, Ryan told his rapt audience that he was on a tour of the UK, but spontaneously decided to abort this and go on a tour of the world! - "I'll be back in August. I just realized, why the fuck am I travelling the UK. And putting off the world trip. When I can do that now." Ryan - master of the punctuation mark.
Ryan first came to prominence in the anime scene when he travelled up to Aberdeen, Scotland - where he offered the local Anime Club two laptops and free flights to Japan in exchange for a small amount of money from the Club. Had to beat a hasty retreat when his past caught up with him, and begged £20 off of the Club president, claiming that "his wallet had been stolen in London".
Ryan Gentle was turned down for engagement from a THIRTEEN year old from Cornwall in the year 2007. Rape in a tent anybody?

We're Scammin'!

Ryan has also played a part in simple web hosting scams. He is banned from <a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">WebHosting Talk forums after multiple attempts to scam people by offering them web hosting deals that seemed almost too good to be true (especially when he was selling at a significant loss). One of these scams resulted in the now fabled <a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=345137" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Arcstudios scam in which victims lost hundreds of dollars in fees paid to Ryan by wire transfer for web hosting that never materialised.

Another fun scam was the <a href="http://www.gbgl.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Great British Gaming League (or GBGL for short) scam. Conducted in the summer of 2006, it involved GBGL taking up Ryan's offer of setting up their anti-cheat service among another features. Being a keen and professional tradesman of his /Scam" title="Scam">craft, Ryan demanded nothing less than money up front for the services. Naturally, Ryan neglected to tell GBGL that part of the whole deal included the all important "I'm not doing any work and am going to run away with your money lol" clause. GBGL were thus stung and were set back by at least six months because of the whole fiasco.

Gently Now!

A history of injuries and accidents, as told by the man himself.

"Run over 4 times before the age of 16, spent 6 weeks in a coma the first time around."
"Fell from the second floor of many buildings, many times - got injured not too badly, apart from one time when I broke my left leg, and fractured my left wrist."
"Bounced for 30ft on a gravel path at a high speed after hitting a set of 12 steps on ice, at 4AM in the morning whilst skating in the dark. I never saw the steps coming."

(EDIT: The reality of the above statement is as follows... "Bounced for 6ft on a tarmac path at a mediocre speed after skating off a set of 3-4 steps, at 8:45pm whilst skating in the fading light. He never saw the steps coming because he wasnt looking where he was going and took a wrong turn...")

"Whilst in infant school, tripped over and bounced - stood up with a stone lodged in my head which had to be removed by paramedics."
"Fell out a tree in a thunderstorm, I climbed it for a bet - I dented my clavical (collar bone?) or something like that, but it didn't break."
"Fell down the set of steps they have at Cheddar Gorge, cut and bruised quite badly."
"Fractured my ankle at Ayacon, don't ask how."
"I've broken/fractured countless bones, and even managed to trip up and ram a small screwdriver into my elbow once."
"There's more, but I won't scare ya. ^^;"
"My health has been degrading since August due to high levels of stress and more recently, had quite a worrying cancer scare (sorry to disappoint, but I'm on the mend). "

Quote Bin

Up and coming nonsense, straight from the horse's anus.

"[Italy is] where half of my heritage is from... Trying to think where in Italy I've actually been, Milan, Rome, Florence, mainly the middle one." <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=97760&highlight=#97760" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, March 2007
"I used to work for [Virgin Media], at the Albert Dock in Liverpool - such a... blah... ;_;" <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=95834&highlight=#95834" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, March 2007
"I've been working on a novel for 4 years - it has close to 2,000 pages now... I might need to split that up. <_<;" <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=96115&highlight=#96115" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, March 2007
"I've just been offered a job over in Tokyo, starting in May. It's for a Design and Development company, but it's based in-house... to be honest I'm more interested in the JET program." <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=95267&highlight=#95267" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, March 2007
"I'm ex-army, and have been doing martial arts for several years. I can also fly small aircraft (Cessna 182 etc.)" <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=78219#78219" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, January 2007
"I've been doing Kenjutsu for 8 years, and am pretty damned good." <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=73994#73994" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, December 2006
"Lolz at the ED article, MSN me for the rebuttal link. XD" London Expo Signature, Late-March 2007. (His "public" rebuttal was originally only available to his MSN victims, but was eventually added to his LJ and is talked about below)
"I must of [sic] been invisible whilst at the hospital... sweet... a super power =D!..... I'll call her back in a minute, anyone want me to pass on a message?" Ryan on the Tokonatsu forums taking credit for saving the ex-girlfriend who was drinking out of stuff being spiked by, you guessed it, Ryan. <a href="http://www.tokonatsu.org.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?t=45&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=15" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Tokonatsu 2007, April 2007
"Suffered two second-degree burns to my fingers last night, painful. Supposed to go see a Doctor, screw that. -.-" <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=142240#142240" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, June 2007
"I've yet to cosplay to an Expo event (I prefer to cosplay to out-of-country events)" (Implying he's travelled to cons in other countries) - <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=120896&highlight=#120896" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, June 2007
"I just realized, I'm in America at this time - sorry guys. ^^ ... bunch of mini-trips. I don't consider going over there a "big" holiday. o_O" (Clearly an international jetsetter) - <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?p=116265&highlight=#116265" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo, June 2007
"I'm multi-orgasmic.. so I could cover you in cum and rub it into your skin.. using it as a massage oil.." [MSN convo, 2007]
"The Army broke my knee, and thusly they owe me lots of moolah. Said moolah is deposited tomorrow." [MSN Convo, August 2007]
"People assume that because I talk to girls.I'm sleeping with them.Just because the majority of the Expo attendees couldn't get laid if they paid someone." [MSN Convo, 2007]
"People assume I'm a lowly steward, when in-fact I'm a Co-Ordinator. I'm also quite prominent in the industry itself, which is why the organizers are scared of me." [MSN Convo, 2007]
"Uncle #1 - Extremely high up in the National Front, something I absolutely hate - but as a result, people are terrified of him - HE R BAD PERSON. Uncle #2 - Owns the largest taxi firm in the South West, and has a sizeable stake in First Great Western - worth millions. Mother - Former lawyer, won £3.5 million in compensation following a prescription cock-up that fucked with her head. Her family started a famous chain of hotels on top of this, ain't saying what. :P Father - Captain in the Royal Navy, was involved with Submarine related stuff. Myself, have worked with various Animation studios in the past - and have gained many friends as such, most of my friends are the type of people who attend the Expo's as guests.I think Paul is worried I'll tell them not to come again. xD For instance, Hisami, the Furisode-san/Geisha from JapanEX - is a client of mine." [MSN Convo, 2007]
"*Thinks.* - I wonder.. should I train you to become the perfect submissive sex slave to me.. xD I love girls like that. The thought of them wearing nothing but a collar and leash, on all fours, sucking me off. xP" [MSN Convo, 2007]
"Stupidly high endurance. Multi-orgasmic. I don't go soft and die." [MSN Convo, 2007]
"He isn't that tough i just go to the police with evidence of peadophile materia and tackle him to the ground with two of my army buddys."[MSN convo, 2007] - funny, ED doesn't remember seeing that particular materia in Final Fantasy VII...
"Pull this stunt again, and I will personally disable your WoW account - which seems to be the only thing you have going for you. Now, if you continue to cyber a 15 year old girl - I will be contacting the authorities. :)" [MSN Convo, 2009] - Lulz, the moral guardian!
"A man tried to assault my mum and I intervened. >_> Got a call, she's having problems with these really dodgy neighbours. I went out, bloke had hit her, he went to do it again and I grabbed his fist. He grabbed my throat, so I twisted his arm off me. He tried to punch me, I proceeded to throw him into the ground. He tried again, I made him headbutt a wall. I then proceeded to detail the finer points of not fucking with Ryan. :/" [MSN convo, 2009] - A hard fighting man protecting his mother.

And finally, proof that sometimes you don't need to write comedy - you just need to wait until it happens, then write it down...

"You know I could Fuck me. Yeah i tottally would fuck myself." [MSN convo, 2007]

Yes Ryan, and that's EXACTLY what we wish you would go and do.

StopRyan.org

A netizen known as "Zefie" (owner of zefie.com) decided to investigate further after being threatened by Ryan (owner of zefie.net) with legal action lest Zefie give up, erm, Zefie.com. After some research, he discovered the <a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=345137&highlight=Ryan+Gentle" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Arcstudios saga and decided to take action, taking ownership of zefie.net (as well as other domains) as a preventative measure against future scams by Ryan. Soon after, Zefie set up StopRyan a forum where those who had been affected by Ryan's lies and scams could congregate and natter about his various crimes.

Ryan was always lurking however, first registering an account, then redirecting google searches before finally hacking the StopRyan forums and wiping most of the information there. Eventually, financial circumstances and constant threats by Ryan caused Zefie to give in to save his sanity. Ryan was allowed permission to upload the now infamous flowery tribute known as "love ryan" in exchange for Zefie keeping zefie.net (the domain which Ryan was wanting the entire time). Ryan did promise $200 in a donation to Zefie and says that Zefie "realized that the accusations were becoming far too absurd, and quite bluntly bullshit." Zefie however states that he received "not one cent" from Ryan and that he "still believes that he is a liar and a confidence trickster."

As the American site went down, an information forum also called <a href="http://stopryan.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">StopRyan was created and maintained by <a href="http://amecon.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=36&st=0&p=1986&#entry1986" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Prestwick who suffered him when he appeared at an Anime Club in Aberdeen. Eventually that was taken down after Ryan's mother intervened, promising to set Ryan straight in exchange for the site being taken down voluntarily. To this day however a <a href="http://stopryan.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">handy dandy FAQ exists on the site and explains the reasons behind the site being taken down. Today, a <a href="http://stopryan.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Blogspot diary now exists as of March 2007, author uncredited.

Raving Private Ryan

Around the summer of 2006, Ryan announced on his <a href="http://nandayo.livejournal.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LiveJournal that he was in the British Army training program, apparently being fast tracked into the paratroopers due to his <a href="http://passion.com/intgroups/gi7845/mi48503673_44727/rhZefieNET/acrlist.html?who=UmFuZG9tSVbYKozJ30xcorR_Sjos7DFLQ/rLIxk1qWw_29P97rre5KfeH6/aarbnRYtzbN/LRPYmXhOFYNc/1HNF7GJ7Hlii2b/5AQcX_2/d0zlQfotuoCftapoti8nITp/HNL8SiqdvlgzTiCFcRSzVpqm_3cwD4Aj8Lv_Kesg0mVP4pYRi9c_9lhSep_sldRuU863gu9hI4R/ZdZscqQ--&dcb=passion" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">renowned physical endurance.
Ultimately his goal was to serve in Iraq, possibly after rapid promotion to squad leader commanding his own regiment. He offered occasional lulz in regard to his progress and even though internet access was very much a limited commodity he always found a way to let us know how he was doing... but as his predetermined date to ship out neared, it all started to go wrong for our national hero in the making. His cursed old knee injury forced him out of wherever the hell the camp was supposed to be (presumably not Plymouth), and back to his former less glamorous surroundings (Plymouth) before he was able to earn his <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Victoria_Cross" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">VC. Besides, AmeCon was fast approaching, and attending a private event you're banned from and haven't paid for is far superior to crawling around the desert hunting down former Ba'ath party members.

He was supposedly "too injured" for recuperation at <a href="http://www.army.mod.uk/hqschinf/itc_catterick/itc_training_battalions/4_battalion/williams_company/index.htm" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Williams Company military hospital, hence being discharged and sent home.

The fightback!

Ryan isn't one to take things lying down, oh no! With his /E-lawyer" title="E-lawyer">legal team only a /Bullshit" title="Bullshit">phone call away, Ryan decided to opt for a handy /Lie" title="Lie">rebuttal of all of the charges leveled against him on this ED article! Initially the first report of his rebuttal appeared on his London Expo forum sig and it looked as though it was only ever going to be available to his legion of under age fans on MSN Messenger. However suddenly, out of nowhere, he posted it in full on his livejournal. Lulz, arguments and the usual Ryan fiasco followed and when people started commenting on how one thing contradicted another or how he was just lying through his teeth as usual, Ryan put on his screening gogglez and pwned the naughty comments to kingdom come!

He then promised to sue several people for pointing out his lies - well known to be a crime eagerly pursued by Internet Lawyers. Unfortunately, several months later, all of those threatened are still waiting to be sued, despite helpfully offering to provide him with real names and addresses so that he can pursue his doubtless water-tight lawsuit. He'll probably get around to it when he's finished quashing the insurrection in Iraq and re-wiring the Internet, or whatever he's up to at the moment.

After this, things got a bit too intense for /Emo" title="Emo">Ryan's fragile disposition. After coming out with a completely random story about some donkey he had befriended or something which nobody has a clue about (as the "prominent member" hasn't come forward), he posted a tearful farewell, announcing his intention to depart for pastures new. Do not weep for him, for he is already /Dead" title="Dead">dead, and all that jazz.

Actually, this is a usual bit of /Serious_business" title="Serious business">Ryan fun. Normally, when he has caused so much drama and chaos, he suddenly announces that he is going off to be emo or travel the world or pretend to join the /Basement-dweller" title="Basement-dweller">army, but you can be certain that he'll be back soon rather than later. Sure enough, Ryan has been sighted since his latest dramatic flounce offstage, offering condolences to ousted AlCon chair-spacker Mewski on her recent butthurt episode.

Very recently it appears that Ryan has decided to take matters into his own hands, getting one of his fanclub to create an account on ED as "/index.php?title=User:Sir_auronDX&action=edit&redlink=1" title="User:Sir auronDX (page does not exist)" style="color:rgb(204, 34, 0);">Sir_auronDX" and attempting to deface the ED article! Such a nefarious attempt was futile as the proper version of the page was restored within 45 minutes. However, the joke is on him as his own user page on ED sports some of the sickest images known to man!

Sir_auronDX in his own defense says: I was brainwashed by Ryan and his scam of ultimate doom. Luckily some of my non-butthurt friends brought to light how fucking cuntish this douchebag is and as a repayment, Promises to give the article past history of Ryans msn convos where he said more bullshit than anything.

Most recently, Ryan himself finally appeared and attempted to deliver another >rebuttal via the name RyanLulz. This attempt however was shutdown and the precautionary sick images deposited on his user page.

Convention Antics

AyaCon 2005

Ryan's most notable contribution over the weekend was as lackey to several of the cerebrally disadvantaged <a href="http://chris-coltrane.livejournal.com/133449.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Idiots. Ryan provided copious amounts of manga (series unknown, hopefully /Naruto" title="Naruto">Naruto) to be burned outside the main building in a mutual show of solidarity, surety, and stupidity among those banned from the event, a growing club which Ryan has managed to cement himself into for the foreseeable future. Other reported hi-jinks involve offering £1,000 cash for late membership; hacking into the AyaCon forums and masquerading as the chairman whilst replying to several posts; applying for a dealer's table at the event under the company ZefieNet; sneaking into convention accommodations and stealing linen and quilts from a random room and then camping in the lobby area; employment of /Metal_Gear_Solid" title="Metal Gear Solid">Tactical Espionage Action to enter the convention area on a "borrowed" membership badge and finally, tarding about in a shopping trolley on Sunday evening (no known injuries surprisingly).

KyuuCon 2006

Reports were that he had booked and paid a ￡4m liability insurance bond for a venue that hadn't heard of him, but was able to cancel this to postpone KyuuCon on a whim until 2007 (fingers crossed!!). He also spread rumours that the LAC (London Anime Club) was providing funding for KyuuCon. <a href="http://www.otakunews.com/article.php?story=552" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Kyuucon is dead

AmeCon 2006

Truth has been most elusive this time around. It's generally accepted that after a miraculous recovery from his combat injuries Ryan appeared at AmeCon, despite knowing he was banned, and attempted the usual four-figure bribe for a weekend membership. It has also been suggested that he tried to get several minors drunk to take advantage, but no assaults have been reported from any quarter. It is suggested that Ryan tries /Buttsecks" title="Buttsecks">Buttsecks Park across from the university campus for sexual deviance in future. There are also conflicting reports on whether he left the main campus immediately in a taxi bound for the train station paid for by the convention (money well spent if so), and how much of the weekend he was present for. One story that has been forgotten like tears in the rain is worth repeating verbatim.

"I was in the same shit hotel room as him [Ryan] in the end, he somehow managed to worm his way into the group of people at the Castle Park Hotel. But man, you should have heard the lie he came up with for what he was doing while we were all at the cosplay ball [Sunday evening]. Apparently he spotted someone trying to break into a property sellers, so he ran down and out to stop him, to which he pulled out a knife and sliced his arms. But he took him down and then gave a report to the police for two hours.

"You should have seen the cuts, my nails could have done more damage, and it's amazing how he was sliced roughly 10-12 times on each arm. What kind of person goes for an armed robbery with a weapon that does as much damage as a fresh toothpick? I couldn't believe it when the other people in the room believed him. He said he had to change his bandages because they were so blood stained... yet when I was cleaning today, [it was] amazing how the bandages managed to vanish into thin air.

"I hate his lies, nothing he says about himself is true, everything he says has these huge holes in them which everyone should be able to see. It never adds up. He asked me if I was interested in going to the Japan trip with him next year, I said fuck off."

It seems Ryan makes few supporters IRL.

Alcon 2007

AlCon, a doomed first-time convention which <a href="http://www.neomag.co.uk/forums/viewtopic.php?p=16389&highlight=sweatdrop#16389" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">no-one will go to, due to it being scheduled the weekend after AmeCon 2007 and in the SAME CITY. The first many heard of this event was when Ryan e-mailed UK anime dealers claiming to be their dealer liaison. In a desperate bid to claw back credibility AlCon put out a press release disassociating themselves from Ryan and making it clear they've bought him a one-way ticket to BannedVille.

MCM Expo

Ryan's final line of attack against the UK anime scene is the MCM Expo where he was until recently a forum moderator. He is currently organising his seventh <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?t=4429" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">trip to Japan, /Lulz" title="Lulz">lulz inbound!

It has also transpired that at the most recent Expo event, Ryan was caught peeping at those of the fairer sex (or possibly just at some skanky looking cosplay attention whores) while they changed in the Cosplay changing rooms. In a cunning piece of planning, the break room for gophers at the event was situated right next to said changing rooms. One eyewitness claimed to have seen "Ryan looking at them through a window" only for him to "duck down so you could only see his eyes above the window ledge".

JapanEx 2007

The Build-Up

With the latest Expo event on the horizon Ryan is already hard at work on his gangs of /Gullible" title="Gullible">trusting forum ~~victims~~ friends. He claims to have <a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?t=5085&start=0&postdays=0&postorder=asc&highlight=" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">rented two whole apartments just for the weekend, which everyone (i.e. lots of soon to be /Madeleine_McCann" title="Madeleine McCann">sexually abused underage children) can sleep in.

As with every other event /Serious_business" title="Serious business">Ryan ever organises it largely involves people giving him money while he claims he himself is going to make a huge loss for everyone else's benefit. He insists he doesn't mind if people pay him on the day but hints advance /PayPal" title="PayPal">PayPal donations would be a big help. Despite initial scepticism, Ryan's promise of free stuff and drunken fumbling won over the doubters, and he is doing a roaring trade selling space in his Chinese slave house operation to gullible 13 year old animu fans.

Sadly, to the /OMFG" title="OMFG">"surprise" of all, Ryan announced that the whole apartment idea might be in jeopardy and even talked of doing his usual cut and run tactic of quitting from the accommodation idea for "personal reasons". Probably realizing that maybe people wouldn't buy such an idea (especially if they had already handed over cash), Ryan had a back-up plan, claiming that nobody was interested in the idea to begin with. This is quite obviously a load of /Balls" title="Balls">bollocks when you consider the legion of\lil' lolies queuing up, waving their pocket money at Ryan to get in on the idea.

Thankfully, when persuaded to continue with the idea, Ryan has announced that he is going ahead, even putting up a final list of lucky, lucky people for everyone to laugh at. Recently though, drama has exploded on the thread. With the Expo forum mods either too stupid or too far up Ryan's rear end to do anything, arguments are raging throughout the actual thread over whether Ryan's offer of buying half of the Docklands for underage Anime fans is true! We shall have to wait and see!

NEWS UPDATE

Recently it came to light that this was the latest of Ryan's scams (surprise, surprise...). When Ryan told the group of happy con-goers ignorant enough to believe him that he had paid the £250 rent for the apartment they all paid him an equal share between them towards the rent, not knowing it was Scamtime.

However when they got to the apartment building The Great ScamLord declared that a credit card was needed to insure the apartment in case any massive damage was dealt, but unfortunately he does not have any bank cards (which is believable considering he used to be bankrupt due to one of his scams). He managed to convince one unlucky chap to fork his card over to Ryan. First he told the poor guy to wait in reception, and then Ryan's scam went into motion. While the card holder's back was turned Ryan charged the full £250 rent of the apartment onto his card and keeping the group's money in his own pocket, profiting all teh monies.

At this point we must remind readers to ALWAYS follow the golden rule: NEVER BELIEVE HIS LIES!

**LATEST UPDATE** It appears that The Great ScamLord has paid back the person who had money charged on to his card. A good sign of things to come? Doubtful. However, it does mean no profit for Ryan over this incident - victory!

On the day

When the day of Expo finally rolled around there were many lulz to savor. The months of Ryan's internet tough guy act had lead to a member of the forum getting his e-penis wounded in battle. The butthurt member of the forum wanted to sort it out IRL with IRL violence, making it harder to reference for this article except by word-of-mouth (cue for\Ryan's rebuttal).

Once at expo, this member of the forum proceeded to go straight up to Ryan and tell him to step outside. Ryan's biker-gang and army history quickly erupted into it's most deadliest form as he stepped outside, holding the hand of one of the JapanEx committee members to make sure they did nothing but talk. Mid-conversation, Ryan apparently ran away from them both, very manly like, to go hide in a corner and start crying. He also got his buttbuddy Sir_AuronDX to anonymously prank call the member of the forums in order to teach him a lesson he wouldn't forget soon! But like always Ryan decided to lie and claim it was Sir_auronDX that called this person on his own initiative so he could turn ass and run the other fucking way fast.

EXPO waves goodbye to RYAN!!

Despite many warnings from forum members, Ryan's lies and dramalama antics on the London Expo forums have been consistently ignored by the Administrators. Following his little escapade at the JapanEx - you know - the credit card scam of an unsuspecting forum member - the Admins were again inundated with complaints. It seems that Ryan owes many other forum "friends" money too (NO, surely not, you cry!). Initially, Admins response was to ban all those members who dared to raise these issues on the forums. Was Ryan paying them off too? It didn't look good for Expo! Finally sense prevailed - the Admins extracted their heads from their anal cavities and took some action. They have deleted Ryan's forum account and say "if Ryan wants to attend the MCM Expo events we have no problem with that. What we will say is that we will no longer be asking him to serve in any capacity working for or helping with the shows." I should bloody well think so too!

Cosplay picnic

Ryan is no stranger to love. The Cosplay Picnic is an event where people who like Cosplay, and like minded people, descend on Green Park in London in the hope of having a nice picnic with friends both old and new. Ryan, however, continues to make its unwanted appearance and dick things up for some, if not all.

On the event dated 7th April, Ryan grafted his odious self to a small group intent on making themselves as heavily /Drunk" title="Drunk">sociable as possible. With Ryan aiding them (by topping up drinks and creating drinking games to keep the booze flowing), he added to the consternation of organisers and onlookers alike when one of the group collapsed to the ground and needed medical attention for drinking too much. As a result, she needed to be tended to by ambulance crews, and was admitted to St Thomas Hospital. Meanwhile, Ryan whiled away the time wandering around, asking people if they had seen his vodka, showing his concern for the person in question by banging empty bottles together for no apparent reason, (cutting another attendee's hand badly in the process), and generally acting like nothing had happened. Eventually, he was made to go attend the scene while ambulance workers were tending to her but others, very angry at his behaviour, had to be led away to prevent an incident.

Later it transpired that Ryan had been spiking her drink and that she had in effect drunk an entire bottle of vodka gradually over a short period of time. It was some justice that someone nicked what vodka he had left.

In a slightly smaller incident, Ryan spread rumours about Amecon forum goer Royster being a pervert. In a rare display of good sense, Ryan apologised for these rumours.

Luckily at the latest picnic (late June), Ryan didn't turn up, thus ensuring that no /Drama" title="Drama">drama whatsoever actually happened AT ALL.

AmeCon 2007

AmeCon tradition dictates that Ryan's name is one of the first on the Banned List. This, however, means nothing to the pea-brained fuckwit - he is expected to rear his retarded mush anyway next weekend. Updates (and no doubt more lulz) to follow.

lulz Indeed. Current reports indicate that the Arch fuckwit didn't show his grinning visage, despite the fact that gophers and committee at the con had devised their own callsign specifically for him for use over the radio. Expect lulz when his excuses come out. Probably at AlCon.

The drama ends... or not

After what appears to be an almost-confession, Ryan may well have seen the error of his ways, and is moving on. Perhaps the lying wretch never will scam again. But as always with Ryan, we repeat: NEVER BELIEVE HIS LIES!!! This is much more likely to be an attempt to cut all ties with anyone who can link him to any of his scams, so he can start scamming again from scratch.

Last known destination: <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Centralia,_Pennsylvania" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Centralia to try and scam its remaining seven residents out of their toxic homes, ready to launch America's biggest con ever - BusuBusuCon!

However, it is the opinion of this site that this prime sperm/egg waste does not deserve, and should not have, the luxury of shrugging off the past just like that. One keen-eyed EDitor has spotted Ryan on the Global Phenomenon that is FaceBook, rejoicing in a new name. Searching for Ryan Gentle used to bring up the image of a blue-haired fucktard with the name Ryan Gentle - the same search still brings up the same picture, but it now sports the name of Ryan Albright. A simple spot of googling reveals that this is a surname everyone's favourite compulsive liar has been known to <a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=536429" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">use before. Furthermore his FaceBook friend list still contains remnants from his notorious past in the UK >animu scene.

Ryan quite clearly does not grasp the concept of Six Degrees of Separation.

Two-Facebook

He is now believed to be living in Birmingham with his latest g/f who he picked up on the London Expo forums and dated even whilst he was dating and scamming (yes surprise, surprise he owes her money) another 'lucky' forum member. His assumed identity as Ryan Albright is now on a falsified birth certificate, not just his Facebook alias. Perhaps a body with authority has caught up to him and he's running away, badly? Reports are that everyone's favourite compulsive liar is working in a Birmingham video games store. England expects every Brummie gamer to do his or her duty, and get the smug shite fired. His Facebook photo has been changed - to a face-shot nearly identical to his most famous pic (see top of page), and his friend list has also been drastically truncated - to include not a single soul. Oh irony, how delicious art thou...

We're Scammin'! Part Deux (2008 update)

Sadly, it doesn't look like he has dropped his scamming ways. Obviously smarting financially from having to pay back all that money from the Expo Apartment scam, Ryan has started a brand new webhosting company known as Serasoft. First off however, he needed some kind of webhosting space and went to <a href="http://www.astutehosting.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Astute Hosting, however his credit card (probably stolen) was declined and instead had to use the good ol' tactic of begging and running without payment. He listed himself as the aforementioned Ryan Albright, the name he has on that falsified birth certificate, as company director, which we are sure his local Trading Standards Office and/or police would be somewhat interested in learning.

Update: After speaking to one of his former colleagues from Birmingham, it turns out there was no falsified birth certificate, only a name change via Deed Poll. Which is probably just about the only legal thing the useless wanksplat has ever done in his 'adult' fucking life.

With his scam in place he went fishing on his old favourite place for gullible fools: Web Hosting Talk. The usual amazing promises of huge features, loads of webspace, bandwith and low prices (as long as you pay by bank transfer) and this time, he's even offering financing... although what lending institution would help him out is beyond me! In any case, before he was found out, some poor guys had already been conned and now the long and laborious procedure of claiming the money back through paypal begins. One good nugget of information however has come to light, as on the Serasoft website (Already dead... how many minutes did that last?) appears to be Ryan's World of Warcraft character details:

Character: Katsuya.
Class: Shaman.
Level: 63.
Race: Draenei.

So if you see him, GRIEF WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE! He also opened up 'fuminet' and created a guild called <a href="http://forums.wow-europe.com/thread.html;jsessionid=8D3F4A096ACEA0B5708E9C2715BE98ED.app06_05?topicId=3349726631&sid=1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Hitokiri on the Moonglade-EU server, character name is Kazuya. fuminet also made a scheduled appearance at his old fav, web hosting <a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=695493" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">talk yet again . Up to his old tricks, as per usual, but under the name 'Ryan Dawson'.

NevaTV/NevaDigital Scam 2010

Anyone who doubts that Ryan is still active should take a look at the links below to follow the latest scam under the name of Vievi/Ryan Fletcher (the surname of his fiancee). Those of us who have followed Ryan's /Douchebag" title="Douchebag">antics over the years, will immediately recognise his grubby fingerprints in the forum drama. There is also no mistaking his 'modus operandi' ....same old, same old. <a href="http://forum.nevatv.com/index.php?showtopic=33" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://forum.nevatv.com/index.php?showtopic=33 <a href="http://forum.nevatv.com/index.php?s=0329c97d3b14c430c93996d15102e483&showuser=1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://forum.nevatv.com/index.php?s=0329c97d3b14c430c93996d15102e483&showuser=1 <a href="http://www.dotallyrad.com/2010/05/24/neva-digitalvievi-hon-scam-details/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://www.dotallyrad.com/2010/05/24/neva-digitalvievi-hon-scam-details/ There is more proof out there if you need it! I suspect this scam is already over though as Ryan is 'on holiday' at the moment - no doubt spending the prize money!

=== Reddit (2011-2012) ===

A little late to the party, but it appears Ryan has finally found Reddit! He now goes by the name Ryan Kennedy and has the new registered company <a href="http://companycheck.co.uk/company/07626330" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Affinity Networks Ltd as well as having found an affinity for .so domains - as this is where affinity.so and reflex.so (amongst others) have found their TLD home. Known Reddit usernames are: LazyGenius, ReflexLTD and NotAffi. Now claiming to have wealth in the millions and making as radical claims as ever, Ryan has started advertising job openings. They sound promising - but given he can't keep hold of a limited company for more than a year don't bank on those promotional prospects! He is also still active on Web Hosting Talk under the name Akisoft amongst others, promoting his new Affinity.so and Reflex.so websites as well as getting up to his usual tricks of selling "new" iPads and other items far below market value.

=== Flirble.me (2013: Half a decade on) ===

Welcome butthurt <a href="http://flirble.me/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Flirble.me customers, yes, unfortunately you too have been scammed... Ryan is /Self-diagnosed" title="Self-diagnosed">ill again, he possesses quite possibly the worst immune system on planet Earth. <a href="https://twitter.com/Flirbtastic"><img alt="Twitter-favicon.png" src="" width="16" height="16"/> <a href="https://twitter.com/Flirbtastic" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Flirbtastic <a href="https://twitter.com/Ryantehninja"><img alt="Twitter-favicon.png" src="" width="16" height="16"/> <a href="https://twitter.com/Ryantehninja" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Ryantehninja This time his company lasted a whole TWO months, a new personal best!

=== Recent Ryan Rebuttal (2013-???) ===

Obviously, Ryan is well aware of this page and has made multiple attempts to either deface it or take it down forever. He even posted a rebuttal blaming his many (mis)adventures on supposed cancer (definitely one for the "Gently Now!" section, Police harassment caused by not very nice people SWATting him by tipping off the police and other bollocks which frankly nobody cares about.

=== Sufian's experience with Ryan ===

Oh Hi, remember me? Yes me Sufian the one who stupidly started work at Flirble LTD on the 21th November 2012 and stopped a month later. So here is the story of my experience with Ryan Kennedy: 21 Nov: First day at work. 25 Nov: Called in on weekend for work. Looking to change to a bigger office. (Last day working from the office.) (Ryan got hit by a car.) 26 Nov: 21 Dec: Work From Home. 29 Nov: Formal email regarding departure of co-founder. 29 Nov: Ryan suddenly wants to move Flirble to the states. 21 Dec: First month of work complete. 13 Dec - 27 Dec: Ryan stops responding. 27 Dec: Dialed Ryan's favourite number: 101 (after a billion messages across 5 different methods of communication.) 27 Dec: Called Ryan I said hello he said hello. I said it's me Sufian. He paused for a few secs and said, hello, hello I cant hear you. HUNGUP (He switched his phone of straight away for a few hours.) 27 Nov: Emailed him few mins later with a 24hr warning via email to pay me. (10 minutes later a response about payments being processed by the end of the month.) 2 Jan: Threatened legal action via email followed by a text to make sure he reads the email and does not say it went to junk. (His response to the email was via text, saying he is in the hospital and the company. is in process of dissolution) 2 Jan: Filed employment tribunal. 4 Jan: ET Approved.

1 Feb: If Ryan does not respond judge will make default judgement. 8 Mar: Court hearing - 10am @ Employment Tribunal, 4th Floor, 30/31 Friar Street. About 0.01% chance he will show up or respond. Now thats legitimate information don't believe me it's in the public domain call up ET. Keep running, one day we will get you. P.S. Stop kidding yourself you cosmopolitan drama queen.

—Sufian Hassan

=== 2013: Q2 + Q4 ===

Welcome to the group of people stupid enough to give Ryan Gentle money - New companies are: 08356952 NuPlay + NZBX.co(Director: Ryan Kennedy - 1986-12-17 - "Enterpreneur") Company addr: St John str - companiesmadesimple forwarding Dir addr: St John str - companiesmadesimple forwarding Created: 11 January 2013

<a href="http://www.reddit.com/r/usenet/comments/1jam4s/nzbxcoopen_source_newznab_alternative/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Lolsome disscusion 08505571 Cryptography (Director: Eleanor D Brittain - 1991-11-10 - "Scientist")

Company addr: St John str - companiesmadesimple forwarding Created: 26 April 2013

<a href="https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?PHPSESSID=hqejekb7us966ue34ut2gu86j7&topic=237537.0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Ryan has also now spread into Bitcoin Mining. <a href="https://twitter.com/Lemon_SX"><img alt="Twitter-favicon.png" src="" width="16" height="16"/> <a href="https://twitter.com/Lemon_SX" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Lemon_SX <a href="http://pastebin.com/cmbjB4RD" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">More Info

Known Aliases

/File:Ryan_avatar.png"><img alt="" src="" width="100" height="100"/> /File:Ryan_avatar.png" title="Enlarge"><img src="" width="15" height="11" alt=""/>Most frequently used avatar

/File:Ryandisguised.jpg"><img alt="" src="" width="100" height="92"/> /File:Ryandisguised.jpg" title="Enlarge"><img src="" width="15" height="11" alt=""/>Ryan: Master of disguise

He has appeared many different forums under the following names.
Active

Ryan
Ryan Albright
Kazuya
Ryan Dawson
Kousei
Kouryu
Kaimei
Vievei
Ryan Fletcher
Ryan Kennedy
Lemondev
Lemon_SX

Inactive

fumiNET
Katsuya
Kousuke
Sasuke
zefieNET
zefieNET LTD
zLTD
ArcStudios
Ket
Ketsuyo Tetsunawa
Ketsu-kun
Nandayo
Kazuke
IlluZefie
Alex Jacks
Suzanna (occasionally impersonating his mother)
Keisuke-Kun
Kira
Kira-sama
Kyuukai
Elijah Albright
Kanashimi
Senshimedia
Avalon Systems

Links

Created By Ryan

/File:Ryan_senshi404.JPG"><img alt="" src="" width="400" height="163"/> /File:Ryan_senshi404.JPG" title="Enlarge"><img src="" width="15" height="11" alt=""/>The shocking sight of a predictable "work in progress"

~~<a href="http://www.senshimedia.net/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">SenshiMedia.net~~ (deleted)
~~<a href="http://akanemedia.net/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">AkaneMedia.net~~ (deleted)
~~<a href="http://kanashimi.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Kanashimi hosting~~ (deleted)
<a href="http://www.zefie.net/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Zefie.net (No longer owned by Ryan)
~~<a href="http://nandayo.livejournal.com/"><img alt="Lj-favicon.png" src="" width="16" height="16"/> <a href="http://nandayo.livejournal.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">nandayo~~ (deleted)
<a href="http://senshimedia.livejournal.com/"><img alt="Lj-favicon.png" src="" width="16" height="16"/> <a href="http://senshimedia.livejournal.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">senshimedia
~~<a href="http://serasoft.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Serasoft, current webhosting scam~~ (Dead nao.)

About Ryan

<a href="http://stopryan.org/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">StopRyan.org (dead)
<a href="http://stopryan.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">StopRyan.co.uk (now a "StopRyan FAQ" holding page)
<a href="http://stopryan.wilde-world.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">StopRyan.Wilde-World (see above)
<a href="http://hachimaki.livejournal.com/37854.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Gently Does It (Guest starring Ryan as Suzanna!)
<a href="http://digg.com/business_finance/Internet_Con-Artist_Exposed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">"Exposed" at Digg.com

Sightings

/File:Ryan_adulthub.jpg"><img alt="" src="" width="125" height="94"/> /File:Ryan_adulthub.jpg" title="Enlarge"><img src="" width="15" height="11" alt=""/>Eww...

<a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=695493" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">FumiNET webhosting scam, May 2008
<a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=659775" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Serasoft webhosting scam, March 2008
<a href="http://senshimedia.livejournal.com/6901.html#cutid1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Against all odds (due to overzealous rampaging hordes from the established ED members) the link to Ryan's rebuttal, April 2007
<a href="http://www.tokonatsu.org.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?t=45&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=15" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Trying to take the credit for saving the girl HE tanked up with vodka!, April 2007-Link now defunct
<a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?t=4359&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Varying lunacy at the LondonExpo forum, March 2007 (pretty epic nonsense)
<a href="http://amecon.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=215" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Still not sure if he's banned or not on the AmeCon forum, January 2007
<a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=536429&highlight=Ryan+Gentle" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Caught trying to start another webhost scam at WebHosting Talk, August 2006
<a href="http://www.londonexpo.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?t=3785" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LondonExpo forum, December 2006
<a href="http://passion.com/intgroups/gi7845/mi48503673_44727/rhZefieNET/acrlist.html?who=UmFuZG9tSVbYKozJ30xcorR_Sjos7DFLQ/rLIxk1qWw_29P97rre5KfeH6/aarbnRYtzbN/LRPYmXhOFYNc/1HNF7GJ7Hlii2b/5AQcX_2/d0zlQfotuoCftapoti8nITp/HNL8SiqdvlgzTiCFcRSzVpqm_3cwD4Aj8Lv_Kesg0mVP4pYRi9c_9lhSep_sldRuU863gu9hI4R/ZdZscqQ--&dcb=passion" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Pimping himself at Passion.org, May-July 2005
<a href="http://forums.animesuki.com/showthread.php?t=6052" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">AnimeSuki forum, January 2004
~~<a href="http://browse.theadulthub.com/profile.aspx?user=zefienet&webmaster=TheAdultHub" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Nasty profile at TheAdultHub~~ Unavailable, but see right for a screengrab!
<a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=345137&highlight=Ryan+Gentle" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">The ArcStudios saga at WebHosting Talk, November 2004
<a href="http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=920787" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Avalon Systems scam at WebHosting Talk, January 2010