The God Warrior

More like hamburger warrior, amirite?

The God Warrior (aka Marguerite "Oh God, it's coming this way!" Perrin), is a plus-sized batshit insane Christian psycho maniac who appeared on an episode of Faux reality TV show, Trading Spouses, back in 2005. During the episode, Marguerite switches homes with a family who are "New Age humanists", who have items such as "TAROT CORDS", "GARGILES" and other "DORKSIDED" objects around the house. Upon learning this, she begins acting out by throwing up, shouting erratically, praying, and being the typical Christian that she is, she attempts to convert the other family to Christianity. When the other father attempts to enlighten her on their views, she refuses to listen.

Once returning home, Marguerite (having been traumatized by her entire ordeal) literally fucking implodes on her own family, tears up the prize money, rants about shit nobody cares about and unknowingly sets off a record amount of lulz both IRL and on the internets. Of course, being the greedy bitch that she is, she later accepts the prize money, despite having "GIVIN IT UP TO GOD" earlier in the program. Her excuse, that she would use it for a bypass surgery, was a lie as the money will be gone the next time she visits her local McDonald's drive-through.

"IF YOU BELIEVE IN JESUS YOU CAN STAY, OTHERWISE GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE"

Quotes of Wisdom

The Dorkside Chronicles

Perrin is known for some of these thought provoking quotes:

• "ERVRYTHING IS UNGODLY! DORKSIDED!"
• "Gargiles! Slykicks!"
• "Did you not axe if she was a Christian?"
• "She's not a CHRISTIAN-AaahhHHH!"
• "I WONT MY GOD, AND I WONT MY FAMILY!"
• "I'm a spiritual warrior becau-I just feel like I'm a spiritual warrior..."
• "Get the hell out of my house, in Jesus name, in JESUS NAME I PRAY!"
• "Yes, YES! She DID!" (Please note that it is never explained what Marguerite was referring to by this.)
• "She, she's TAMPERED in DORKsided stuff!"
• "I've been educated where I've been going; I've been educated on... stuff."
• "GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE. IF YOU BELIEVE IN GOD YOU CAN STAY!"
• "BUT I needed your prayers!! I needed you to be prayin for ME!!!
• "It was so dork-sided!! BAWWWWWW!"
• "I REBEUK IT IN THE NAME OF THE LORD!!!"

Videos

GODWARRIOR IS BOOMER? She's not a Christian ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN Crazy Parking Lot Lady VS The God Warrior Previous Video | Next Video

Commentary On The Warrior

“	"Haha stupid fuckin Christians. Their all fuckin retarted. Anybody who has an IQ above 130 is atheist. I have an IQ of 156 so burn you stupid fuck heads"	„
—wallstreetkiller1168, IQ of 156, still doesn't know that their is for possesion and They're is a contraction of 'they are'

Actually, bitches probably know about this one.

“	"What a fuckin porker."	„
—torypuck94

“	"GLUTTONY IS A SIN YOU FATTY! GOD WOULD NOT WANT YOU AS A WARRIOR YOU PIG!"	„
—xmyklxisxcoolx

“	"Yeah, Id like to back up in that ass."	„
—beforethebuzzer

“	"She can't tear apart that check, but if it was a bag of Doritos or a box of Oreos she would have those polished of in a matter of seconds."	„
—mediajnke1

“	"Someone married that thing?"	„
—Ochostinko857

“	"She probably lost her front teeth in battle."	„
—- A random guy

Dead Daughter

File:GawdWarriorDeadDaughter.jpg

In September of 2007, Marguerite's righteous indignation was addressed when her decidedly un-God Warrior daughter Ashely was killed in a car accident. As she was a heathen, Ashley managed to squirt out a kid prior to her death. It is confirmed that Marguerite will use the tragedy to raise the child as a God Warrior, using vivid imagery the tragedy of her mothers death as motivation.

Gallery

• 
  IMMA CHARGIN' MAH WARRIOR
• 
  Not even Mrs. Perrin is safe from the horrors of devianTART.
• 
  Fat Bitches: Collect em' all!
• 
• 
  i herd u liek slykicks
• 
• 
  The many faces of Marge.
• 
• File:Godwarrior.png
• 

See Also

• Fat
• Christian
• Facepalm
• Insane
• Redneck
• White trash
• Retard