Swap.avi
SWAP.avi is the most horrible thing ever produced by teh internets. This movie involves so much fecal matter, it transcends the genre of scat porn. SRSLY, it's pretty awful. You will be tempted to try and find this movie. DO NOT! You must resist the urge to ever view this movie. It has brought grown men to tears and is partly responsible for famine in Africa and the Holocaust, not to mention the crucifixion of Jesus Christ.
The abomination that is SWAP.avi was the brainchild of one SomethingAwful goon called Metis. Unfortunately, unlike most children conceived over the SA forums, Metis's was not aborted. It was allowed to grow under the watchful eye of a Brazilian company that makes custom porn movies, the same studio behind 2 Girls 1 Cup, and The Passion of the Christ.
Once the terror had grown to full size it was unleashed onto the internet to rape and pillage, leaving behind a horrible stench wherever it went.
SWAP.avi is a good example of endgame, meaning it is officially the worst thing to ever be created and posted on the internets and, thanks in part to the advanced calculations of Stephen Hawking's wheelchair, it can be said with complete metaphysical certitude that nothing could ever exceed it in terribleness.
The Pitch
In summary--and this is not an Aristocrats joke--Metis wanted the following:
—Metis |
Where Metis got his idea ...( SATAN)
What you should NEVAR DO
- Watch SWAP.avi
- Read the SomethingAwful review play-by-play
- Download SWAP.avi
- Think about SWAP.avi for
tooa lonnng time. - Fap to SWAP.avi.
What you should ALWAYS DO
- Replace your parents' wedding video with SWAP.avi
- Hide SWAP.avi in the Teletubbies video box at the local kindergarten
- Now Show Friends and Workmates
Teh hurrurz at RedBox DvD rental outlets:
- Download SWAP.avi
- Burn to a DvD.
- Rent a movie from RedBox.
- Switch SWAP.avi with the movie and place into the RedBox DVD case.
- Place in the deposit box.
- ????
- PROFIT!
Teh hurrurz with friends:
- Load SWAP.avi on friend's computer.
- Leave video paused at the beginning.
- Write a note reading "Watch this plz!"
- Leave room.
- ????
- PROFIT!
Did yee knar?
- Only two people were known to finish the entire movie: Zack Parsons at SomethingAwful.com, and its creator, Metis. This rumor has recently been laid to rest, however, as footage of a couple of teenagers watching the entire thing has just surfaced on the Youtube.
- The creators of SWAP.avi had to import shit from other countries.
- SWAP.avi is more powerful than Pain Series, cannot be un-seen, and is arguably one of the only things on the internets that really does not need any moar pooper.
- Metis is either a sick fuck or a gifted and incredibly astute social commentator.
- 93% of men would fap to SWAP.avi; the remaining 7% are gay.
- Desumilk from Paheal is the only known female to watch swap.avi entirely for the lulz.
- SWAP.avi is educational and it is going to be shown in elementray schools all around the world to explain how shit is fun.
The story in pictures
Links
- From ED Member Pi Is A Rational
- Torrent copy
- The SomethingAwful review
- The German remake of the movie
Part 1 uploaded in Rapidshit.(dead as of Nov 2014)Part 2.(dead as of Nov 2014)Part 3.(dead as of Nov 2014)Part 4.(dead as of Nov 2014)get it here from megauploadV&
Swap.avi is part of a series on Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage. |
Swap.avi is part of a series on Visit the Faggotry Portal for complete coverage. |