Katiethesinger123

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MAN THE HARPOONS


Katiethesinger123 (Powerword: Katie Thornton, born 20 January 1997 in Leeds, England) is a horrific she-whale that excretes inhuman noises from the gaping hole of no return, her mouth. Most YouTube users unfortunate enough to see this mountain of lard suffer from Post Traumatic Event Disorder, and can take months to begin functioning in normal society once more. The monstrous she-beast uses a pattern of grunts and noises to form words in order to cover such classics as Ke$ha's 'Tik Tok' and Justin Bieber's 'Baby'; all of this "music" sounds like an old buffalo being castrated while having large dildos shoved up it's ass. The majority of an average "song" is spent by the viewer attempting to recover from what they have just witnessed, while simultaneously attempting to save themselves from further exposure to the cancer. One will at first wonder how, with that much fat, chins, and heavy labored breath, she could pull off the insanely improbable feat of singing; truly an inspiration to us all. Her "singing" makes such other prodigies as Rebbeca Black, or Justin Bieber sound like the prestigious opera singers. Due to all the aforementioned factors, this fucking hambeast monstrosity is constantly flamed with attrocious comments and messages, along with being a prime of example of what happens when you stuff your ass with McDonalds and KFC.


Appearance

The horrific she-whale is an abomination; one of the greatest eye-sores known to mankind. Legend has it that this is the ass pie offspring of the legendary Moby Dick himself. Upon seeing her ungodly visage, one will instantly remark at a few aspects of her appearance.

  • She is fat and ugly.
  • She is fat and ugly.
  • SHE IS FAT AND UGLY.
  • She looks like a 485 pound mule that's had its snout smashed with a hammer .
  • She may have the legendary triple-chin.
  • When she stands up, mankind is left in awe at the colossal behemoth before them, letting out wailing noises which cannot be understood by the human ear.
  • Some say there is buried treasure from within her rolls of fat.
  • She has more rolls than a bakery.
  • She looks like the offspring of I got married last weekend
  • She is a horrific hambeast.

Talents

Katie has such amazing talents as eating, sleeping, staying in one place and breathing; however, these are downplayed by the fact that she suffers from the inability to form coherent sentences, cannot sing, or look human.


An example of her exceptional singing talents


   
 
KILL IT WITH FIRE!
 

 
 

What to do when encountering a wild Snorlax

In the rare event that you should perchance to encounter the she-whale leaving the confines of her room, you will have a small selection of choices to make, as the she-whale's insatiable hunger may force her to eat you.

Gotta catch em' all!


Fanbase

The she-whale's fan-base mostly consist of musically oblivious 12 year old girls and people with a fat fetish showing admiration towards this horrific she-beast. These fans posses a mental capacity equal to that of a glove, as demonstrated by their responses to the musically inclined: 'Haters gonna hate'. It is quite apparent that a musical Jew will never pick her up, or in this case, use a crane, but the fanbase is ever optimistic that this will definitely happen.

Links

Katiethesinger123 is part of a series on YouTube.

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